2 wonderful children though, but a wife cold enough to chill beer

Cathode Ray Tubes? How quaint. Here is some advice – it’s the 21st century. Get an LCD before the tube radiation makes you sterile and you no longer have to rely upon your personality for birth control

Things are happening in SL and all this idiot can think of is how to make up artificial queries from non-existent people and post it as if he’s some kind of bubble-sack Dear Abby.

I came here for news – not some deviant basement dweller’s made-up masturbatory failures about his wife f*cking his landlord or pretending to be a woman suddenly overcoming hormonal changes because he saw several cartoons screwing in a box. You sir, are full of sh!t.

But, since you feel you are qualified to give advice, let me try my hand at it also, since I’ve probably had more training in this field than you’ll ever know…

Q: DEAR PETERATTACHMENT, I’m a lonely 19 year old still living at home with my mom and haven’t seen actual growing grass in years. My mind reels at what normal people do and I imagine them having all sorts of problems that I will never experience and I have this fantasy where I can give advice in case a real person with a similar problem reads it and wonders what he can do short of writing his most personal confessions to a complete stranger living in his mothers house. How can I get rid of these bubbles in my nut-sack?

A: DEAR BUBBLE-SACK, rest assured that even though your gonads consist of nothing but a skin bag filled with air, nobody will notice unless you post a spurious article in a presumed “newspaper” for all to read. Don’t worry about the symptoms – you shouldn’t feel anything unless you go around advertising your lack of male genitalia. You will lead as full and normal a life as can be expected of any person that spends his life sitting in a box with a Cathode-Ray Tube beaming in their face 16 hours a day eating that pre-digested sh!t your mom calls “food”. So have faith, you are not alone. There are probably several people in the world that are exactly like you. Except they go outside and talk to other people sometimes. And they have hobbies and jobs and things like that. And friends. Just stop trying to masturbate all the time – your mom says she loves me and she’s tired of washing all your crusty underwear.

I’m sure, as a “trained professional” that you would concur with my assessment.

Yeah, probably, since all the assholes would have jobs as landlords.

Tell your husband that he should thank God on high for the amazing box which gets you all hot and bothered for him! Tell him that he needs to get you a better graphics card to make you even hotter. Tell him that he should call all his buddies so that they can put their wives on SL too – share the wealth.

But first, wait an hour. Neither of you should talk with your mouths full.

Yes, just like internet fashion faux pas! Maybe they should have the question askers post a pic of their RL face? Because that would certainly make it more SERIUZ. LULZ.

Oh how the wheel turns…

I was thinking more like a lover. I wouldn’t be surprised to find that perhaps she is getting free or discounted land from Mr. Landlord, in addition to some sexing…

I think this guy needs to probe around a bit more and then have a conversation with his GF, and try his best to not sound too accusatory.