“He has common sense, cunning and an intuitive understanding of townfolk, which the other Haggens lack. In fact, as he himself points out, Festus is good at a lot things. Cards, horseshoes, singin’, dancin’, fishin’, huntin’, trappin’, trackin’, drinkin’ sweet-talkin’, tusslin’, cussin’ and shootin’ all come naturally to him. And to compensate for his illiteracy, he has a vast knowledge of oral folklore and a prodigious memory. He can, for instance, recite every book of the bible”

‘Cept for the spellin’ o’ Festus’ last name and bible part this am rite on The Enoch famberly bible, in the outhouse, only had about four pages when I come along. I recollects them “begats” rite well.

now sites like this here one:

http://www.eviltwin.velvetsofa.com/Curtis/guide.html

Shows that you don’t need so SL to waste yo’ time. I reckons it AM the how Interwebs tube-thing what am to blame for our squalor, sadness, and drunken hootenanny shindigs.

Like ol’ Festus done said:

“A little’s a little, and a lot’s a lot, there ain’t no little lot, or lot of little, don’t you see? Now you want that beer or don’t you?”

Bank Update: 10L in the till. Hoo whee. 5L am guaranteed to the first investur (unnamed) who done got a shotgun already.

MARSHAL DILLON: “Well Festus, out here in the West all us country folk are very hospitible, and don’t you forget it pilgrim. ”

FESTUS: “Ya see now Marshal, thar ya go again waxin’ all strange on me. You ain’t never called me ‘Pilgrim’ befer. Lets get you down to that there saloon and let Kitty see whats what. Thats all ya be ailin’ fer.”

MARSHAL DILLON: “Yes Festus, lets go down to that saloon. That saloon where you don’t have to worry about saying something wrong and gettin your nose shot off”

FESTUS: “It weren’t always like that Marshal. You know that. Its bees bein yur hard work that be carvin’ civilization outta this here stinkin’ prairie. Its all worth it Marshall Dillon…”

MARSHAL DILLON: “I hope its all worth it Festus. When I stare off a hundred miles into the future I want to see all the good things for this prairie: A feller with his kids livin in a decent ranchhouse with some of that high class wallpaper on the walls. A guy with his kids around, a little money in the bank, maybe a bottle of corn squeezins for the evening times…”

FESTUS: “I reckon that thar sounds like a powerful vision of Some Life in the future Marshal. I jus hope that thar bees bein some room fer shootin’ and killin’ in the name of the law…”

MARSHAL DILLON: “There will be Festus, there will be…”

Hmmmm, Senban, to go there, Pappy must be age verified.
Are you sure he made it through that process? It’s a rather complicated form to be filled … ))))

Can we trust Pappy Enoch’s advice longer than three days? Can we trust him with our money past the point the gin shop opens? Will we find our Rindendorrahs stuffed into the G strings of a succession of wriggling wimmins in the seedy dens of Zindra?

Hehe j/k Pappy you know I loves ya really 8D

Maybe they’ll wise up, now that the money am goin’ faster’n a ’70 Charger Hemi with a load o’ Kickapoo Joy-Juice on the way to Knoxville.

I reckon. Or maybe not.

So send Pap yo’ money, and don’t trust no Russian feller who got hisself a pen. I got me one o’ them type-writin’ mersheens so ya’ll KNOWS you kin trust me.