Comments on: First Bank of Enoch Holler Fails

By: Pappy Enoch

Pappy Enoch — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 22:53:34 +0000

Oh ma’am yo’ kind words do warm my poor broke heart.

I asked for a different cell but no dice. Them beatins from my rotten terrible sister continues.

Send me a cake wif a file in it, please!

By: Farmetta Funster

Farmetta Funster — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 04:15:59 +0000

Dear Pappy,
Now that yore the hoosegow, ah expect that you will be wishin’ to git some mail ‘n’ some cakes from your fans.

Gals, ah aim to win this here competition. Meanwhile, that there Jezz will soften him up for us. Erp, I mean, leave them paws off’n yore brother, Jezz, or we’ll be waitin’ at the sally port fir ya.

By: Pappy Enoch

Pappy Enoch — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 19:07:58 +0000

Oh woe am me, Miss Farmetta. My rotten sister am at fault, cause she found out I give her a marble instead of the glass eye she claimed I done promised her. I planned to pay them investors back as soon as I got the piggy bank from Jezz when she were drunk…

Oh boo hoo hoo the law dawgs done catched us both and we am both in jail now…in the same dang cell and Jezz done beat the stuffin’ out o’ poor me usin’ a 2×4 wif nails in it!

Oh cruel fake world…I are in the jailhouse now.

Worse part am some little kid from in town wants the marble back!

Oh boo hoo hoo.

By: Farmetta Funster

Farmetta Funster — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 04:07:20 +0000

Why, Pappy! Ah am shocked! Shorely this cain’t be true! Here ah was gonna invest mah hard earned egg money in your bank, and lookee here, people are saying the vilest things about you. Say it ain’t so, Pappy!

Your heartbroken fan, Farmetta

By: It's Unfixable

It's Unfixable — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 16:21:56 +0000

@Marilyn – I guess he thought himself more a mover and shaker than a common tater.

By: Sylauxe

Sylauxe — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 16:11:06 +0000

I got banned from a gor sim for taking over the slave auction as auctioneer and using the phrase “sexual chocolate” too many times.

By: "Bob"

"Bob" — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 15:31:42 +0000

Time to do the right thing, Pappy, and begin the Lord’s work.

http://www.subgenius.com/

There “am” souls “what am” ripe for the picking like green lettuce.

By: marilyn murphy

marilyn murphy — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 15:28:56 +0000

i got banned from a gor sim for calling the leader guy the grand tuber.

By: Miss Petunia Courtney Amaryllis Taliaferro, SL Leage of Decency

Miss Petunia Courtney Amaryllis Taliaferro, SL Leage of Decency — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 02:43:25 +0000

That hideous misbegotten ape! HE has the late Reginald Candlewick Portnoy’s “Ponderosa Serenade,” winner of Tepid Life’s 2008 Prokofy Neva Medal for anti-collectivist art!

The artist killed himself by crying until he strangled to death on his own tears, when he heard that the painting had been stolen from my bespoke and stately home, Doilywood.

I knew it was some rustic bumpkin who vandalized and burglarized my demesne. There were wrappers of moon pies and empty Nehi Grape bottles everywhere amid the wreckage.

My legal eagle, Tertullian Blatherskate, Esq., of Blatherskate, Snopes, Gantry, and Blatherskate, will soon be hot on the trail of this barbarian who has so traumatized me.

I shall sell this brain–what there is of it–to the dogfood plant and have my revenge!

By: Pappy Enoch

Pappy Enoch — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 02:33:26 +0000

“Too big to fail!” Hoo Whee, Emp’rer Norton, I weighs 375 buck nekkid (which I are now) so I reckon we got us a slogan.

But oh my gawd…stop a talkin’ about them Steampunk fellers who wants my brain. I cain’t sleep nites already for fear o’ them brain-wranglers comin’ for poor me.