Missing Lindens

by prokofy on 02/11/06 at 3:19 pm

Missing1
By Prokofy Neva, Dept. of Rumours, Conspiracy Theories, and Inside Dope for Inside Dopes

They’re still booming the treacherous waters of Omidyar off the rocky coast of Rodeo now, but with the month’s mind come and gone, I’ve been forced to give up my lonely vigil for any clue to the disappearance of my old Linden friend, Kenny ….and now I hunt for another missing one — David Linden.

Kenny Linden went missing from the People list in August; it was at that time his typist was said to leave LL for unknown reasons. A resident-turned-Linden, Kenny was known for his incredible dedication, philosophical approach to the contradictions of Second Life, and his skillful handling of a famous sign-griefer stand-off.

We searched for clues to Kenny’s disappearance when the tide was out in the fateful hand-eye stamped sea of Omidyar, always fearing we’d come around the next shoal and find his lifeless avatar face down on the unforgiving shore. Nothing was ever found.

It was like that for T-Bone Linden, remember? An assignment to look at the books and figure out the economy of Second Life; a brisk and cheerful first appearance at a cantakerous town hall — and not long after, T-Bone, whose calling card I still keep faithfully in my folder, was no more. Like the other economic guru brought in for the same purpose later, G-something? Who remembers her now?

And today…once again the Herald joins the anxious villagers sorrowfully scanning the silent seas: where is David Linden? Still in the People List, his picture is grey, his only group, “The Lindens” and “Numbakulla”.

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Known as David Fleck in real life, the Vice President of Marketing of Linden Lab came to the company in 2005, where he appeared to displace Robin Linden, who was formerly VP of marketing and then moved over to what I sometimes think of as “the girls’ job” of Community Development and Support.

David wasn’t visible much inworld, and became known to SL residents primarily for one thing: explaining at a town hall that SL wasn’t known as a “game” but as he explained later in the forums was a “monetarized socializing platform” and that hereby content-creation was declared the top priority for LL to draw in new subscriptions.

We came to think of David as the bottom-line watcher from various half-heard and half-said things from Lindens who seemed to have to turn in lunch expense reports more, but from our side of the servers, it was hard to know what he was up to.

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Adding to the mystery is the fact that The Herald and other news-watchers have never been aware of any title called “CFO” at LL — it was never on the website until they suddenly announced last week in connection with the island ruckus that there is now a Zee Linden, John Zdanowski, bearing that title. Chief Financial Officer? We were always under the impression that Lindens just took the paper napkins upon which they scribbled their out-of-town game conference expenses and gave them to Jeska to enter into Quickbooks.

We have no idea what kind of power struggles took place in Kremlindenlab; we await news from the boyars to explain to us what is happening within the Tsar’s councils.

Meanwhile, residents still reeling from the after-shock of the sudden island price hike are starting to trade Google search links with the words “HouseValues” and “scam”. They’re gossiping that the new CFO’s departure from the scandal-ridden online house estimators’ service, just as its stock was tanking, may not be a good sign both for future pricing of land in SL and stability in general. We don’t believe in Googlized journalism so we’re still checking this one.

The Herald is still scratching its head over the hiring of a real-life real-estate guy to manage what amounts to the virtual estate of SL — it might be a good thing, though perhaps the price of the SL experience on the expensive and often poorly-performing servers has been over-valued.

Lindens! Come in, please! We can only urge you to let us know privately by email, slhtips@yahoo.com, that you’re ok. We’re ready to bring you to a safe-house and hear your after-action report, which will never be attributed. Your secrets are safe with us!

P.S. I’ve suddenly been orbited out of Omidyar after Spin Martin joined me briefly to take up the vigil. I’m cowering now in Clementina, and forced to give up the search. A Linden online merely confirmed without further comment, “David Fleck is no longer at Linden Lab.”

Clementina_001

5 Responses to “Missing Lindens”

  1. urizenus

    Nov 2nd, 2006

    Prok it looks like you are the only one out there on the lake looking for David. Such a lonely vigil. Where are Adam and Dan and Hamlet?

  2. blaze@blaze.com

    Nov 2nd, 2006

    Ahaha you’re the wad, Prok!

    They need to update:

    http://lindenlab.com/management

  3. Walker Spaight

    Nov 2nd, 2006

    “you’re the wad”

    wow, this is possibly the best comment we’ve ever had on the Herald. I’m serious.

  4. Spin Martin

    Nov 3rd, 2006

    I was wondering where you went. But I did take a picture of a neat build at the dock. Hard to frame with all the mainland design around it.

    (the blink tag is evil, even in 3d form)

  5. Prokofy Neva

    Nov 3rd, 2006

    What does “you’re the wad” mean? Is that a Britishism?

    Spin, don’t play the innocent now, I know you’re the one who orbited me into Clementina.

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