We Luv Borked SL Betaverse – Every Single Weekend!!!
by Pixeleen Mistral on 18/08/07 at 5:35 pm
Blinged-out Mia Linden leaves customer support award up for grabs
Linden leadership missing – front line support left twisting in the breeze
by Pixeleen Mistral, food critic
Volunteers don’t have answers, and neither does Mia
Long suffering residents of the Second Life betaverse – a sometimes semi-functional virtual world – enjoyed the by now traditional weekend service failures saturday afternoon, savoring the failed search, payment, profile, and account balance functions like an especially fine meal.
However, even the most artfully prepared virtual bug feast can become cloying in time, so I made my way to the public Help Island, hoping to find someone to answer some questions – why do these grid problems keep happening? Does it have anything to do with voice chat enabling the world? Why are the Lab’s leaders hiding instead of making public statements about the world’s ongoing problems?
As usual, Help Island was completely full – but after 5 minutes of bouncing off the border, I made it inside – and staggered my laggy way over to a large cluster of avatars. A cloud of Carduccis Sticky Green weed smoke was floating through the chat session – suggesting there might be a Linden Lab staffer in the vicinity. My suspicions were confirmed and I was pleasantly surprised – at first – to encounter Mia Linden. Could some real insight into the workings of the betaverse be had? You might expect an in-world coordinator of the un-paid volunteer resident helper group would have something soothing to say – any competent organization would have prepared the front line support people — or perhaps not. Here is a transcript of my interview with Mia:
Pixeleen Mistral: Mia – what just happened to the grid?
CJ Starbrook nibbles on Mia’s toe
Megafox Andrew: hehe
Megafox Andrew: lol
Opalie Bade: I am never gonna make that clearance sale
Corey Hastings: Mia
Panther Kitty: They are investigating on the issue.
Carduccis Sticky Green: puff puff pass… the air is full of weed smoke
Mia Linden: sorry i had to return it to u
Mia Linden: WAY TOO NOISEY
Corey Hastings: are u a volunteer? i need some help
Mia Linden: I am a linden
Mia’s bling: Linden pride necklace
Corey Hastings: cool
Mia Linden: but there are many volunteers here to answer your questions
Corey Hastings: which is best?
Pixeleen Mistral still wonders what just happened to the grid
Mia Linden: Pixeleen
Mia Linden: try reading the blog
Mia Linden: and u will know
Mia Linden: 
)
Pixeleen Mistral: I read it and it said something was broken
CJ Starbrook: looks like search is back up
Pixeleen Mistral: but it didn’t say why that happens every weekend
Mia Linden: well hun Volunteers won’t have that answer
Pixeleen Mistral: I’m looking for the story behind the story
Mia Linden: why not ask where u will get an answer
Mia Linden: and that is the Support Portal
Mia Linden: thanks!
Pixeleen Mistral: I was hoping that a Linden might have an answer
Mia Linden: Pixeleen
Pixeleen Mistral: yes, Mia?
Mia Linden: that is not my area of expertise
Mia Linden: i told u where to ask
Mia Linden: go to the support portal
Volunteers and front line Lindens don’t have answers, go to the support portal so we can ignore you more efficiently
Pixeleen Mistral: the comments are closed on the blog
Mia Linden: Dear
Mia Linden: u do not hear me do u
Pixeleen Mistral: and the Jira doesn’t really have a place for me to ask
Mia Linden: the blog is where we notifiy of current issues
Mia Linden: the SUPPORT PORTAL is for support
Mia Linden: questions
Mia Linden: and so on
Mia Linden: TWO DIFFERENT PLACES
Pixeleen Mistral: I want to know why this keeps happening every weekend – where do I ask that?
Mia Linden: now i need to get back to helping others
Mia Linden: PIXELEEN ASK YOUR QUESTION AT THE SUPPORT PORTAL
Mia Linden: CLICK F1
Mia Linden: I have told u that 3 times now
Pixeleen Mistral: nice meeting you Mia
Pixeleen Mistral: have a good day
Second Life: We are investigating disruptions in search, teleportation and related services. Please watch the blog for updates. Thank you.
Isn’t it time for the Linden leadership to answer some questions?
After Mia Linden departed to polish her official Linden bling in private, I wondered how it feels to be in her position. She seems to have been carefully drilled to stay on-message by the Lab management. It cannot be fun when that message is that customers who want some stability can go F1 off.
With the mainstream media turning negative about SL, how bad must the situation get before top management for the Lab makes an appearance and takes some responsibility for providing a reliable service? Without a change in the situation, it is hard to image many people would want to wear a Linden customer support collar necklace – perhaps that is why that VP for Customer Relations job is proving so difficult to fill – who will play mission impossible with their career?
Solar Legion
Aug 18th, 2007
Pix, the volunteers are an in world help service for actual, real in world problems. They’re not there to answer questions on Grid status, nor are they privy to server side issues.
I’m a MEMBER of the mentor/volunteer program … They don’t tell us these things as they’re not things we get asked.
If you’re looking for these answers, follow what Mia told you to do. That or write a letter/actually go to the Lab and ask there.
Mentors and the Lindens in the Mentor program have more pressing matters to attend to – like helping someone figure out how to complete their build or script, aiding first timers using their land tools … You know, the kind of thing some people do on a daily basis.
We’re not the Grid/server Tech Support Hot line … we don’t do the service work on the Grid. we just answer questions related to activities and the like.
Dire Allen
Aug 18th, 2007
I have a question for the Herald writers: Do you ever write anything about SL that is positive? I mean anything? Can’t you find something that is positive about SL? I mean there has to be something besides Grrl 6 photoshoots, and this Linden Conspiracy crap.
Vlad Bjornson
Aug 18th, 2007
“We Luv Borked SL Betaverse – Every Single Weekend!!!”
Of course, YMMV. The entire Grid was not buggy on Saturday. I was just at a live performance of our SL vaudeville troupe. We had over 60 avatars in the sim, most watching the show and almost all dressed to the nines in their Tiny outfits. No problems at all.
I have been having very few problems on the grid lately. I’m sympathize with the folks and regions that are having trouble, but it is not all doom and gloom in SL. It’s still very possible to have fun in-world.
d3adlyc0d3c
Aug 18th, 2007
What happened is this, every fucking weekend when Im off work I accidently crash the grid. Its so unstable anyway, but apparently the servers cant handle sending tens of thousands of offline IMs from ‘Ni.gger Linden’ and so it crashes.
Also here is my press release for my latest weapon:
i am proud to say that the efforts of the JL.U and the f.urries to surveil our operations and prevent us from being successful has resulted in the developement of an unprecedented ni.gra technology, which will undoubtedly result in INFINATELY M.OAR L.ULZ.
It began with the unveilling of Y.ara’s surveillance script he used to betray us. After further analysis and research I am proud to say we have found *GREAT* use for this technology. Now instead of having time activated devices, or devices activated by date, they can be activated from outside of SL via email. In fact we have indeed discovered how we can use an object to poll an email address for commands similiar to how a botnet would operate with a topic command, using an autoresponder and some code to parse email messages. This new development will surely revolutionize our operations in a way we have not seen before. Its application is not simply limited to s.im crashing, g.rid crashing, IM sp.amming and other functionalities we have used before. We can maintain complete control over our w.eapons from OUTSIDE of the game. I will have finished the script 10 days from today at the very most and I will be unveilling the prototype so that *EVERY* SLer will hear our message, loud and clear. Gentlemen, we have conquered the grid. That is all.
Tenshi Vielle
Aug 18th, 2007
:O
What a great Linden.
Dimitrio Lewis
Aug 18th, 2007
I understand it can be frustrating when Second Life isn’t functioning optimally, but this article is just mean and disrespectful. As you were told the blog is the place to go for information and updates on the situation, and the answers to your questions were posted there. You don’t get special treatment because you write for the Herald. Pasting the public conversation and calling it an “interview” is misleading and displays a total lack of ethics. Mia devotes a great deal of time to supporting Volunteers and Residents on HIP and around the grid, and doesn’t deserve to have this trash written about her just because you’re frustrated at not being given inside info that isn’t even available in the first place. You talk about the mainstream media being negative on SL, but you’re doing a fine job of attacking it from the inside.
Spankubux
Aug 18th, 2007
Pixaleen, you are a complete ass. In order to manufacture a story you intentionally interview someone you know won’t be able to answer your questions in order to humiliate them on this piece of virtual toilet paper?
Lord knows why Uri and walker let you shit all over this place and call it news.
Enigma Snook
Aug 18th, 2007
Vlad Bjornson that really sounds productive. You must have nothing but time on your hands, and no Real Life worth living.
Jessica Holyoke
Aug 18th, 2007
here’s what Pixeleen is getting at and partially what I was writing about. Mia told Pixeleen to hit F1 to access the Support Portal and the knowledge base why the grid is down. Now, because Pixeleen is not premium, she wouldn’t get a person, but only pre-printed information regarding why the gird is down almost every weekend, which doesn’t appear on those places. And the Support portal tells people that if you can’t find help there, and you’re not premium, you should go to…Help Island.
Again, problems with the information and someone who should have that information has a canned response.
Solar Legion
Aug 19th, 2007
Jessica …. Information on the grid of the nature Pix was asking about is not normally given to Users or even the volunteer Helpers.
If a Linden feels we should know what is going on, they’ll Blog about it.
Mia is NOT a part of the Grid Maintenance team: she doesn’t have the information.
Same for all the volunteers.
This is nothing more than a poorly done article using the wrong sources and worded in such a manner that makes the Lindens look like idiots.
If a Linden does not have the requested information -o to another Linden or to some other source.
urizenus
Aug 19th, 2007
Yes, Heaven forfend that Linden employees and Helpers should know what is going on or…… know and inform us. Maybe LL can hire Tony Snow as a press liason. Even his bs would be better than what we get now, which is a kind of deafening silence.
Thraxis Epsilon
Aug 19th, 2007
I’m going to have to side with the Lindens here.
Just because they got a “Linden” tag… that doesn’t mean they’ve been joined to the collective and have all knowledge of every Linden out there.
Cocoanut Koala
Aug 19th, 2007
In addition, Uri, a little less condescending “dear” and “hun,” and “i told u where to ask,” and “u do not hear me do you,” would be a lot more professional.
(What are these Lindens, 12 years old?)
A nice, “I’m sorry, I don’t know,” would be much better and impart the same information.
Instead of, “now i need to get back to helping others” (as if Pixeleen isn’t a resident/customer too), and “I have told u that 3 times now.”
I think Pixeleen was way too sympathetic in this article toward this Linden, whose attitude sucked from start to finish.
coco
Rodion Resistance
Aug 19th, 2007
Echoes Dire Allen’s sentiments.
“It’s still very possible to have fun in-world.” I’m with you on that Vlad. I guess the concept of fun for SLHerald Writers is not found inworld–it’s found in the delight of poking at LL staffers’ ALL the time (clap, clap, clap, what a neat concept of fun right there yes).
Ass-as in
Aug 19th, 2007
G.riefing. Serious buisness.
Victorria Paine
Aug 19th, 2007
You’re all getting lost in the leaves on the trees and not looking at the forest.
The “forest” is that it is absolute utter bullshit that SL is so unreliable on the weekends. Any provider of this kind of platform knows (unless she has her head firmly planted up her behind) that weekends are the peak use time for *many* users, simply because they have more time available on these days due to work schedules — not everyone, but for many people this is known to be the case. Yet we’ve consistently seen weekend issues week after week after week, mostly getting “fixed” during the morning/day on the following Monday, SF time. That’s a completely bullshit approach to a platform like this. The community deserves answers that are more forthcoming than the bullshit that is in the blog, and more than anything we deserve full-on support (including full on gridmonkeys) during the weekends, and not the skeleton crew while the A team is off sipping Cabernet in Napa Valley.
That’s the “forest” here — not nit-picking about how Pix interacted with Mia Linden.
Solar Legion
Aug 19th, 2007
Uri and Coco – you want answers? go to their damn office in real life and get them. in fact, employ whatever means you have to in real life and off of the internet to get your answers.
Guess what? we’re not here to answer Tech questions on the Grid itself. You go to the people that actually work on the Grid for those answers.
Now to Coco alone: Have you ever been to Help Island Public Coco? Have you ever had to field fifteen or more Instant Messages? Have you ever had to field that many IMs and had to deal with someone asking you questions not even related to your own department?
I’d have been short too. When a Linden or Volunteer/Mentor tells you to go to the Support page/Wiki …. That usually means they don’t have the answer you’re looking for. It takes a truly dense type of person to keep asking the same damn question at that point.
Jessica Holyoke
Aug 19th, 2007
Solar,
I think part of the problem is what you stated if a Linden feels like we should know what is going on, they would blog about it. In the meantime, the days when the most people are on, they are unable to use the service, consistently and without explaination.
For an organization that is supposedly about transparency, there is much opaqueness.
Luth Brodie
Aug 19th, 2007
That’s just typical. The “support” portal isn’t any better even if you have concierge level. When asking the same questions, I recieved the reply of “read the blog.” The blog only has: something is wrong, we’ll update later but not what they are doing so this shit never happens again.
janeforyou Barbara
Aug 19th, 2007
At my SIMs i allways trye to give information to all using Region message or shout in chat on the problems IF i can get it from a Linden or from the blogg, it usly takes som time after the gird start to mess up untill there are any on the blogg, but if i dont inform i get tons of Ims.And ppl are usly happy if i say” The gird are experiense som problems, the lindes are investigating, read the blogg for more update”
Thats realy all it takes to calm ppl. The problems at weekends are usly that there are to few tech Lindes on.Usly after a few houers the blogg tells us ” a server disconneckted, power trubble, a router failed”, and so and so..
Then there are this “bugs” i se every Wednesday tons of fixes, over the last weeks it been this “voice” that been updated and fixed all the time and for a lot of users it still dont work good.Voice are ok som some to use..If you are dysleki,if you are in a room alone, if you got a good English ( some Frensh and German) And if you just like to talk with a few ppl…. The problems with the voicechat i se now are that many users feel ” out of the game” and thats sad.
Solar Legion
Aug 19th, 2007
Yes Jessica, that is a big part of the problem. It isn’t the problem however.
One thing to bear in mind – some of the Lindens, Liaisons mostly, are not anywhere near the servers nor are they allowed access to those systems and their logs. I am not sure about Mia … I think she may be a remote Liaison. Her responses would pan this out.
The only Lindens on during the weekend would be these remote Liaisons and bare bones Maintenance staff. Yes, this causes problems … But then they are a private run business. All of the businesses I’ve dealt with in the past have closed down most of their support and other systems for the weekends.
The ones that don’t are the ones capable of paying a 24/7 support staff, Linden Lab is not at that point yet.
Oh – and so no one feels left out here: I’m at Help Island Public. Or was rather – the SIM just went down.So begins another day at Help Island Public.
FlipperPA Peregrine
Aug 19th, 2007
Y’all are being way too harsh on Mia Linden. She’s far from being the problem. Mia runs the volunteers group, and from what I know, has absolutely zero background in networking, programming, or database engineering, which are the core problems. Point the fingers at the networking team for lack of communication, and you might have a point. Harassing a liaison in world who runs volunteer programs because they won’t answer complex technical questions is just silly! I know in my company, they don’t expect the receptionist or the CFO or the operations team to answer questions about why our web portal is unavailable. They may be able to say, “Yes, it is down, and here’s an ETA” but not get into the nuts of bolts of the problem at hand.
Spankubux
Aug 19th, 2007
“That’s just typical. The “support” portal isn’t any better even if you have concierge level.”
Bullshit. You are talking complete bullshit, Luth Brodie. Be sure to brush your teeth when done.
oh.nooo
Aug 19th, 2007
Lot of l.
When soon or later a happy griefer get caught for dos, and spend some time in the jail-pool.
Chance Unknown
Aug 19th, 2007
This is typical of the support and service provided by Mia. Don’t be too hard on her, I think it may even be beneath her dignity to sign her paycheck to deposit it at the bank.
Victorria Paine
Aug 19th, 2007
“The only Lindens on during the weekend would be these remote Liaisons and bare bones Maintenance staff. Yes, this causes problems … But then they are a private run business. All of the businesses I’ve dealt with in the past have closed down most of their support and other systems for the weekends.”
Well, the “well run” private businesses who have customers who are very much online on the weekends don’t approach their business on a M-F 9-5 basis.
Case in point: CCP. CCP started as small as LL did. And they had hiccups and troubles and so forth, yet one thing they recognized from the beginning was that the weekend (and esp Sunday) was not the time to take a day off if you are in the online interactive platform business. LL could learn so much from CCP in terms of how to run a (growing) start-up/small-business it isn’t even funny, but then again LL has so many people cheering them on as they sip their chardonnays in their hot tubs while their customers are losing a lot of $L because the asset server is borked (again).
There are no excuses for this, for anyone who has any standards, to be honest.
Reality
Aug 19th, 2007
Here’s a thought for everyone complaining about the CS Linden Lab has: shut up and get a job there to change it (those saying they have experience) or simply cancel your account (everyone else).
They only JUST started updating the mainland servers from years past to class 5. Unless someone wants to front them the money to update each and every server to the top of the line as well as retune all the software … Stop your damn useless complaints.
Cocoanut Koala
Aug 19th, 2007
Flipper, I’m not being harsh on Mia for not knowing the answers. That would be pretty dumb, don’t you think?
I’m talking about her attitude with a customer.
As for “harassing,” show me anywhere in that chat log where Pixeleen did any sort of “harassing.”
Unless you mean, “talking,” or “asking questions.”
coco
nimrod Yaffle
Aug 20th, 2007
I found a good comic that goes well with this article: http://www.hillsdalesites.org/personal/dwestblade/pix/humor/computer/image004.jpg
Pirate Cotton
Aug 20th, 2007
Would that be the same support portal which, when you have hackers stealing cash from you, provides an automatic reply because – hey, no one works on the weekend, and hackers are certainly only working weekedays!? O yeah, that awesome useful support tool.
Solar Legion
Aug 20th, 2007
Coco, how about you show where in the chat log Mia was not harassed?
Her attitude was not shown to a ‘customer’, but to a person who – after being told to look at the support pages (meaning she does not have the answer) – continued to ask the exact same question. Not to mention the fact that the person she was asking is not a part of the Grid Maintenance team!
Polymorphous Projects
Aug 20th, 2007
I’d point out also that I wouldn’t blame Mia Linden. I would have to guess that she really doesn’t know the answer.
The question is this – Why is it that a Linden out on the grid does not have a better answer or a better place to send people for the answer? Why hasn’t the issue been blogged? Why has a Linden been placed in the position of not having anywhere specific to point customers to for information like this?
Look higher than Mia Linden for where the problems lie.
Thrixx Ennui
Aug 20th, 2007
If Mia is a paid LL CS rep on Help Island, actually.. helping customers.. Then her ignorance of the grid/search/etc. failures is an abysmal black mark for the state of CS in SL in general.
Saying that you don’t know is one thing, saying that you don’t know because ‘its not your department’ is a massive just makes you look like an idiot. Whether it is Mia’s poor skill as a CSR, or that communication at LL between departments/staffers is so poor, it is a pathetic excuse for not answering questions.
LL should be keeping their CS staff up to date on current problems and such to avoid this kind of bad press. An internal blog they could reference would suffice.
God forbid they actually keep their paying customer base informed and comforted that their concerns are being adressed…
Solar Legion
Aug 20th, 2007
So sorry that we’re not able to answer questions relating to issues with the actual server system itself Thrixx. did you ever stop to think that the in world help is almost never asked such question?
Most people will actually ask someone that works on the systems such things – they’re the ones with the answers. If this doesn’t suit your notion of a help system … tough luck.
It’s really very simple: You don’t ask the general help (you know, those whose job is simply to help with in world activities such as building, scripting and the like) why the servers keep failing. Working on the server is not in the job description.
Maklin Deckard
Aug 20th, 2007
“So sorry that we’re not able to answer questions relating to issues with the actual server system itself Thrixx. did you ever stop to think that the in world help is almost never asked such question?” – Solar Legion
Solar, no one gives two shits what in-world help/volunteers/mentors know or don’t know or how often they are asked it. That was NOT the point of the article as Pixeleen was talking to and about a LINDEN acting as LINDEN, she was not talking to another player with a jumped up title and access to a private channel.
Lindens are SUPPOSED to be responsible people. I am honestly disappointed with Mia.
I have spoken to her inworld many times, I was one of the first visitors to her inworld office, and have NEVER seen her doodspeak (‘u’ and AOLish illiterate responses) before or outright blow off a user like this. It’s damn near not the same person I have communicated with in the past…and its a POOR representation of the Lindens as a whole.
She should have stated to check the blog, and when Pixeleen asked again, stated that she didn’t know and had no information to give, and then moved on. Saying ‘I don’t know, no one has told me’ is perfectly acceptable, but the Lindens just can’t seem to bring themselves to show that much respect for players.
Instead, Mia launches into the usual portal/blog mantra all Lindens use when asked for information and then cops an attitude when its pointed out there is nowhere on that portal to ASK that kind of question (not to mention that, even critical problems get replies in the portal in timespans approaching geological epochs, and that any reply there would be a week or so out of date and the same portal/blog cut-and-paste). Would it really have been that hard for Mia to type proper english and to reply with a simple ‘I don’t know, no one has given me the info, sorry’? It would have have defused the situation and there would have been no article. She brought this on herself, sadly enough.
Maklin Deckard
Aug 20th, 2007
“Her attitude was not shown to a ‘customer’, but to a person who – after being told to look at the support pages (meaning she does not have the answer) – continued to ask the exact same question. Not to mention the fact that the person she was asking is not a part of the Grid Maintenance team!”
Oh, I see… You’re only a customer if you shut up, sit down, and don’t question the lindens or their annointed synchophants, er live-help? You got to shiver in delight that a linden actually spoke to you to be a customer? If you ask questions they do not like, you get demoted to ‘a person’, someone apparently beneath their contempt who can be talked down to and rudely without it being considered rude by the annointed customers who accept everything. I understand how it works…same shitty favoritism you see in every poorly run organization … fanboi = good customer.
Pixeleen is as much a customer as the drooling legion of fanbois out to kiss linden ass in the volunteers. Sure, she’s a DIFFICULT customer, most non-fanbois. are since they aren’t satisfied with vague answers and brushoffs.
Pixeleen was PUSHY, Mia was rude and dismissive. I consider the latter (based on Mia’s position) far worse than pushy. But then again, I’m not trying to curry favor with the Lindens and don’t do unpaid work for them.
Solar Legion
Aug 20th, 2007
Maklin, start giving a shit.
Mia helps to run the volunteer program. she was on Help Island. Help Island is not – repeat NOT – for server technical issues.
Pix got the response she deserved = she asked the wrong Linden, plain and simple.
deal with it.
Thrixx Ennui
Aug 20th, 2007
Uh wow.. the post attributed to me is not the one I wrote.. I wrote the one directly above it that was attributed to “Polymorphous Projects”…
urizenus
Aug 20th, 2007
thrixx, your name appears *under* your post. Yes, this has confused many.
Solar Legion
Aug 21st, 2007
“Oh, I see… ”
No Maklin, you don’t see – stop pretending this ‘article’ is anything but a purposely done smear piece. Pix asked the wrong person – she knew she was asking the wrong person. she asked a question that had nothing at all to do with the purpose of Help Island (helping new and old users alike with building, scripting and various client functions).
For Christ’s sake, I was there during one of Pix’s visits to Help Island! On that occasion all she asked about were bullshit rumors …. She did ask how to listen in on the voice channel however. Unfortunately she once more showed that she was not really there for help with that one. Several Mentors attempted to help her … She ignored each and every one and went into the above mentioned bullshit rumors questions.
Like I said – Pix got the answer she deserved … and the same treatment I’d have given her had I been in Mia’s place. I have no sympathy and no desire to be polite to those looking to twist words and perpetuate unfounded rumors.
anomouse
Aug 22nd, 2007
great artical!! please keep this up it MIGHT get the Lindens off thier collective asses …but I dont think so
Bee Mizser
Aug 22nd, 2007
Solar,
Whether Pixeleen was rude or not, Mia could and should have been polite. As a Linden she was the public voice of LL there and should always give a good impression. Mia reacted in exactly the way Pixeleen wanted her to to get this story.
A proper reaction would’ve been “I’m sorry Pixeleen, I don’t have that information for you as that is handled by another team. I’ll speak to them a little later and get back to you with any information I can. In the mean time, there may be some information on the blog, on the JIRA, or on the status pages.”
Chaplain Andrew
Aug 24th, 2007
All I know is I downloaded the software two weeks ago and on two compuers I don’t get beyond the handshake to logon. Wouldnt have a clue where to find out how to logon.
archie lukas
Aug 24th, 2007
I don’t think Pixeleen was rude
The person who was extremely rude was the Linden
what is the point of going in-world and just stating the company line that does not actually fir the question?
There is no where to ask this question or to receive an answer.
In fact the total non-response to specific questions is straight out of a Monty Python sketch.
I keep expecting the Vikings to pop up and start singing the Spam song.