Are World of Warcraft Players Better Lovers?
by Alphaville Herald on 16/11/08 at 12:36 pm
CNN, ABC, AP, TimeOnline cover important news of the metaverse
Brave survivor of failed SL/RL marriage moves on, now dating WoW player
by Pixeleen Mistral, National Affairs desk
CNN reports that 28 year old Amy Taylor caught her real life husband, 40 year old David Pollard engaged in cybersex with a virtual prostitute – part of a string a virtual infidelities that led to the couple’s divorce in real life — and in Second Life!
UK’s Metro posts the estranged couple’s RL typist’s wedding photo
Mr. Pollard’s extra-marital virtual romantic encounters appear to have sunk the couple’s plans for wedded bliss as Ms. Taylor is quoted as saying, “I looked at the computer screen and could see his character having sex with a female character. It’s cheating as far as I’m concerned.”
The report goes on to say that Mr. Pollard admitted having an online relationship with a girl in America – but AP reports that Taylor gave him a second chance. Pollard and Taylor were married in a lavish virtual ceremony in 2005 – a celebration that apparently eclipsed their RL wedding. But their relationship was doomed when Taylor “caught him cuddling a woman on a sofa in the game. It looked really affectionate” according to ABC news.
Meanwhile, the TimesOnline tells us that the couple “live in Cornwall, weigh 45 stone between them and are on benefits” and goes on to say, “In Second Life, the hugely successful virtual reality game that has about 15m signed-up users worldwide, they are Dave Barmy and Laura Skye – a cool-looking, lissom, villa-owning pair of hotties, whose Second Life marriage featured passionate embraces on enormous marble terraces, debutante-style full-length white gloves and yards of strapless taffeta (her) and an immaculate tuxedo, accessorised with killer cheekbones (him)”.
Sadly, the stunning virtual couple has chosen to part ways — and Ms. Taylor has moved on to a more promising romantic partner. According to CNN, Ms. Taylor is now in a relationship with a man she met in World of Warcraft. Hopefully the mainstream media will pursue this story further, so the the most pressing question of the day can be answered – do night elf warriors journeying the lands of Azeroth really make better lovers?
LOL
Nov 16th, 2008
LOL
LOL
LOL
OMFG GET A DAMN REAL LIFE!
LOL
Nov 16th, 2008
The Funniest part of all this is
“….Mr. Pollard admitted having an online relationship with a girl in America…”
That so call GIRL IN AMERICA was most likely in Real Life a 40 year old single male who plays Second Life as a Female Avatar.
In My opnion, it is one thing to go ahead and get off Sexually on the internet, Hell people been having Cyber Sex since the days of Dial up modems and BBX services. However to actually get Married in Real Life to a person you met and had Cyber Sex with online, and then to get a divorce because you find out that person is having Cyber Sex with anohter… that is TOTALLY PATHETIC!
Here is a small bit of advice to all who seek real life romance online. FORGET IT, Get up off your fat ass, take a shower, clean yourself up, put on some clean clothes and GO TO A REAL LIFE SINGLES BAR!
Lols
Nov 16th, 2008
Holy shit, it’s your stereotypical internets-fat-people-that can’t-get-laid-so-they-meet-people-online. I lol’d.
Baron Cuttlesmith von Blogharder, Esqu, MD
Nov 16th, 2008
All this drama, which has leaked to the mainstream media, is shitfucking hilarious. Don’t even consider the whole “cheating” thing; if your spouse is pixelfucking in some game, such failure is reason enough to get out.
Also, that picture is classic, and is a prime representation of SL’s major userbase: fat, ugly, middle-aged fucks who jack off to pixels. There is an epic battle in that picture, with the man’s fatrolls aggressively trying to escape the confines of his tux. I daresay the Side of Lard is winning that battle.
A great remind of how “trolling” in SL is not, in fact, disruptive, but right patriotic. These sort of failmonglers need to be insulted, ridiculed, and called out upon, in order to facilitate a healthy cleansing of shit from the community.
NINTENDO ROCKS
Nov 16th, 2008
LIKE OH MY FUCKING GOD!
These are they type of people who when they played super mario brothers on Nintendo would masturbate to images Princess Toadstool! Like how fucking degenerate are these people? Anyone who logs into a game like Second Life for the purpose of digital pixel sex should be seeking some form of professional help.
Just looking at thier picture I think Lols got it right these are “your stereotypical internets-fat-people-that can’t-get-laid-so-they-meet-people-online” I now understand why people say NEVER MEET ANYONE IN REAL LIFE FROM THE INTERNET! the result is you become a fucking cocktail party joke, that blog that get fowarded to evertone in the office so they can laugh about you around the water cooler. I can only imagine what these internet lovebirds real life friends say about them behind thier back.
wellknowenfriendofall
Nov 16th, 2008
you know i have had enough of all this bull the woman is a no good turned lezbo that why he left her cause she turned gay
and she lied to him and now shes trying to make it look as if he did it thats just wrong
Ranma Tardis
Nov 16th, 2008
They sure are UGLY! Oh my lord, I have never seen a pair that should be meant for each other. Do believe both of them are not only twice the person I have become, perhaps even 3x or 4x!
They are wasting the governments money with their nonsense. No wonder taxes are excessive *pun alert* A “land baron”, looks like he/she gets their second life payout in POUNDS!
I can not take this *laughing* I am going to laugh myself sick! What has the world become?
Derp McDerp
Nov 16th, 2008
Look at those goddamn buttertrolls. They could feed a third world nation.
Amazing how they could communicate with eachother with those fatty greasy sausage fingers. I don’t see how they could type and I’m sure they’d mistake their microphones for snacks.
janeforyou Barbara
Nov 17th, 2008
Are you all shure this story are true? Are you shure its not “planted” as a PR story?
Why in havens name wil this 2 ppl go to the press with this story? RL pics? RL names?
Besides all that,,the comments here show how rude some of the comments are on 2 ppl seeking a sosial/sexual fantasy relation in VR.Look in to your self some?
Alyx Stoklitsky
Nov 17th, 2008
“caught him cuddling a woman on a sofa in the game. It looked really affectionate”
LOLOLOLOLOL, Get a fucking grip, people.
Lemuria Weezles
Nov 17th, 2008
Wow. Such vitriolic hate. Would it hurt to remember that these two are REAL PEOPLE with REAL FEELINGS? And to quote the website here:
“Comments are moderated, and will not appear on this weblog until the author has approved them.”
Obviously, the author of this blog is only out give voice to the lowest common denominator of internet user. Mr. Pollard and Ms. Taylor have lives. A first one and a Second one. The rest of you are apparently cruel imbeciles with nothing better to do than insult people you’ve never met.
No, I don’t expect to see this response posted. Hatred is a better read. What a sad future this world has.
Alyx Stoklitsky
Nov 17th, 2008
“Would it hurt to remember that these two are REAL PEOPLE with REAL FEELINGS?”
That doesn’t stop them from being failures.
Anonymous
Nov 17th, 2008
“Would it hurt to remember that these two are REAL PEOPLE with REAL FEELINGS?”
Meh,they are fat
crofoot
Nov 17th, 2008
Such tragedy…such irony. Especially all the comments (my favorite reading).
Anonymous
Nov 18th, 2008
Wow. I love her expression in that shot. So full of regret.
The question is, HOW DO THEY FUCK? Let alone shit. I mean god damn. Do they hire some mexican cleaning ladies to wipe their shit? Do they do what birds do to fuck? I mean god damn.
Call the zoo, the manatees escaped again.
okay I’m done now.
nonko Noel
Nov 18th, 2008
Attention for Cutomers.
NONKO ROMANKAN repays money to customers.
Send a NOTECARD to nonko Noel.
Thanks.
James
Nov 18th, 2008
Ew!
Surreality
Nov 18th, 2008
“Would it hurt to remember that these two are REAL FAT PEOPLE with REAL PATHETIC FEELINGS?”
Fixed.
Emperor Norton hears a Who
Nov 18th, 2008
Baron Cuttlesmith “A great remind of how “trolling” in SL is not, in fact, disruptive, but right patriotic. These sort of failmonglers need to be insulted, ridiculed, and called out upon, in order to facilitate a healthy cleansing of shit from the community.”
Excellent point and twenty something losers living in moma’s basement, play computer games all day and can only relate to other people by attacking them are just the perfect people to do it. Young luzer, meet old luzer. Don’t try and think about how in twenty years that old tubby luzer will be you. Just keep on eating the Cheetos and everything will be alright.
And oh yes Baron Cuttlesmith, you don’t jack it to pixels ’cause you have a RL girfriend. We really believe you.
Honestly.
Stephie
Nov 18th, 2008
MAN THE HARPOONS!
Baron Cuttlesmith von Blogharder, Esqu, MD
Nov 18th, 2008
Emperor Norton: I run a successful medical practice/law office/financial adviser service in real life. It is a unique experience as my clients are able to complete legal forms while having a colonoscope engage in primary exploration of the bowels, and listen to be give advice on what stocks to short sell the fuck out of in order to make money off of other’s tears.
Second Life serves as an invaluable business tool to me and my staff, who are all required to play it at least an hour a day. By witnessing the total fuckcluster of idiocy in this game, it makes the minor annoyances of patient-clients a lot less easier to swallow.
When not working, I survey my right Baronical lands, frequently evicting filthy underclassmen from their homes for laughs.
Anonymous
Nov 18th, 2008
@ Emperor norton
I DETECT BUTTHURT IN THIS SECTOR, CAPTAIN.
Baron Cuttlesmith von Blogharder, Esqu, MD
Nov 19th, 2008
To the fatties: there’s reasons why across cultures you are ugly, ugly fucks and losers. I’m going to drop down some anthropology on your bloated dome.
Sexual desirability in men is linked to manliness, which is all about testosterone, which provides manly facial features and muscle definition. If you are bloated, it means your body has _lost the war of manliness_. There’s no muscle definition, and instead only useless weight. Also, your face becomes a fat mess, and the distinguishing facial characteristics of manhood are disguised by oh so many rolls of lard. If you are fat, women think “genetic failure” and reject you as such. They don’t want your sperm.
Pappy Enoch
Nov 19th, 2008
Ya’ll go rite ahead an’ make fun o’ us fatty-fats.
Fo’ a “PLUS SIZE” boy, this-hear story shows mee wun thang: they am hope fo’ fat fellers in this-hear wirld! Pappy likes big-lovin’ (it am good if’n yu ain’t got no heat in yo’ trailur o’ shack).
How cood that boy give her up! Mo’ room fo’ Pap! HOO WHEE–pass the Crisco an’ some Pillsbury flour!
I’ll call her mah lil’ love-dumplin!
Pappy Enoch
Nov 19th, 2008
Ya’ll go rite ahead an’ make fun o’ us fatty-fats.
Fo’ a “PLUS SIZE” boy, this-hear story shows mee wun thang: they am hope fo’ fat fellers in this-hear wirld! Pappy likes big-lovin’ (it am good if’n yu ain’t got no heat in yo’ trailur o’ shack).
How cood that boy give her up! Mo’ room fo’ Pap! HOO WHEE–pass the Crisco an’ some Pillsbury flour!
I’ll call her mah lil’ love-dumplin!
Pounamu Kohime
Nov 20th, 2008
Of course a story like this would provoke vitriolic attacks, name calling, disgust – it’s no less than what I expect from the Herald and its reader base, who seem to average the intellect and maturity of a ten year old. It is just toooooo damn easy to take refuge behind your pc and lambast these two folks whose only failure is that they are human with very human weaknesses. Fat? Well nuke America that country is a nation of fatties. Ugly? Well hell the only ugliness I’ve seen so far are the hearts and minds of the posters on SL Herald, who seem to be rage infested rejects of society. They are overweight therefore they don’t deserve to find love, companionship? Every single one of us knows at least one big person in their lives – perhaps a loved person in your family – would you truly hurt those you love with such shameful comments? Their relationship failed – so what, look at the most successful people in history, their lives are littered with failures, that’s what inspired them to become great. And if none of you have experienced the crushing disappointment of a failed romance or marriage, then I say – you haven’t lived!
Get over yourselves people. I challenge any of you that are flawless examples of the human race, without any physical, mental and spiritual imperfections, to have an article written about your shining and amazing REAL LIFE selves and share with us. Go on, I dare you.
Biff
Nov 25th, 2008
Hey Pounamu Kohime… FUCK YOU you loser fucking fat shit!!! ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Fucker!