Yellow Journalists Hard at Work on Potboiler

by Alphaville Herald on 19/09/05 at 8:35 am

by Pat the Rat

Well kids, perhaps you often wonder, as I do, just how Herald editors Walker and Uri are able to support their habits. First, there is Walker, with his taste for pencil thin cuban cigars and first edition copies of subversive Estonian literature. Then there is Uri, burning gallons of diesel fuel as the Herald Yacht tours the Adriatic, breakfasting on iced turtle eggs and chugging mimosas made from Sicilian blood oranges and Cristal. So, how do they afford it? Answer: they can’t. Hence the leading tabloid journalists of the metaverse have been working on a potboiler to keep their pots boiling. I’m happy to report that parts of the book have been leaked by people involved with the Second Life Community Convention. From what I have seen it looks to be just what we’ve come to expect from the two most informative, subversive, engaging, and yet endearing writers alive today.

7 Responses to “Yellow Journalists Hard at Work on Potboiler”

  1. Wandering Yaffle

    Sep 19th, 2005


  2. RB

    Sep 20th, 2005

    Looking pretty good there Uri. Some random comments follow.

    EA has many things to hide. JB is a PR puppet. EA does more harm than good. That horrible collection of game code called TSO is running at a loss. Down with EA. TSO is a smut and crime house. EA is like Walmart, CHEAP. EA – Contempt for everything.

    /end random bunch of comments.

    - RB.

  3. Prokofy Neva

    Sep 21st, 2005

    Uri, I guess it’s up to me to point this out. By publishing your book excerpts, these SLCC organizers have craftily ensured uncritical review of their conference by the usually-hardboiled and cynical SLH journos. They’ve guaranteed nothing but the most tender blow job now over their conference, by appealing to your egos. That leaves Prok to take up a stance on the always-to-be-cut-off-and-discredited left to take a harder look at this conference, just like it’s up to me to slash through all the lacy frills of Aimee’s panties to point out stuff like her advocacy of prosecution of freebie-sellers and prisons.

    For example, to my dismay, I learned at a Thinkers’ meeting that all topics for the inworld parallel conference have to be cleared through this little grouplet of FlipperPA and Hiro and their pals who are organizing the conference, which is basically the Jeskeweler gang (members or sympathizers of the Jeska Jeskeweler group). Of course, it’s just a silly group and the kewl kids can always whine “but no one else would help and we did all the work so why come in and bitch *now*”.

    The problem is that the SLCC did not hold a single, inworld public meetings for organizing this supposedly public conference supposedly benefiting the whole community. They’ve kept it very close to the chest, and fended off all queries with a hurt and annoyed “but we have a wiki, go on the wiki.”

    (Holding a disco or a Katrina benefit doesn’t count as a serious meeting.)

    In fact, Hiro Pendragon even had the temerity to blast me for blasting him for his closed group when the MJW had the meeting with the Lindens (which wasn’t closed and which was covered extensively by the press, belying all the fake concern about secretive cabals).

    One look at the agenda tells you the fluffball nature of this thing — buzzwords like the session titled “Advocacy” by Reuben Linden (is this another way of saying “marketing” lol) or “The SL Experience” with Jeska (I can bet she’s not going to be doings stuff like describe how she makes a determination to close a thread!)

  4. Urizenus

    Sep 21st, 2005

    Prok, the way I see it we allowed them to publish our excerpts as a favor to them. Yes, nothing could do more to legitimize and burnish the image of such a conference than to be connected, even if only tenuously, with the Herald. Even more, we did not charge them. In effect, they got a free buffing spell from us. It is just our way of performing a public service.

    So when we move from the topic of buffing to that of fluffing, I think the real question here is who owes who the blow job. The Herald Yacht will be docked in lower manhattan. Paffy and Hiro can send the exotic dancers there.

  5. Aimee Weber

    Sep 21st, 2005

    So Prok is talking about *slashing* through my panties now. Nice escalation, you must be feeling more comfortable with this pattern of yours.

  6. Prokofy Neva

    Sep 21st, 2005

    Oh, you allowed them? Then don’t fake surprise that they suddenly “scooped” them lol. And yes, absolutely, the SLCC FIC types would love *nothing more* than to have the independent Herald, which, whatever its tarnished rep as a tabloid mired in the muck more than raking it, gleams with the gold of *freedom from the state/monarchy* that the FIC cannot and will not claim. So yeah, you’re buffing up them, and they buff up you by giving you that long-sought-after FICdom you’ve always secretly craved : )

    If you wanted to publish your book, which is interesting, why not do it on your own blogs or something? Why give them the pimping? Oh well, like I said, it’s how it works.

    Hmm, guess I will have to smuggle myself in as an exotic dancer to do that investigative piece.

  7. Prokofy Neva

    Sep 21st, 2005

    Aimee, one of the touchingly funny things about this little provincial burg called “Second Life” is that people like yourself whose avatars and their works become public symbols, and even very politicized symbols of power groupings, get all huffy and angry when someone examines them or lampoons them, which is the time-honored means that all dissidents and the free media use to challenge those who are in power without much accountability. You act as if you yourself didn’t commodify your panties, and if you yourself didn’t laugh all the way to the bank with them. You turn around and act as if you’re just this little old lady who logs in on Sundays and nits and tats her drawers that they used to call the “unmentionables” to make sure nobody ever mentioned them!
    Geez, Aimee, that’s fake. I see through that lol. It’s not about slashing you personally, Aimee, it’s about cutting through all the phony mystique created around these smalls of yours — to use another term that about describes the mindedness and the lingerie itself LOL.

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