Something Awful Goons Plan SL Infiltration/Invasion

by Alphaville Herald on 31/10/05 at 1:31 pm

The W-Hat bannings in the wake of the W-Hat-engineered grid crash have apparently led to plans for many more goons on the Something Awful forums to infiltrate Second Life as stealth W-Hatters. They are being instructed to “find the others” (as Timothy Leary would say), most of which are now reportedly located in Galli. There is currently widespread discussion on the SA forums of how to enter the game and grief it. We recommend everyone read the thread, since in some cases the names are familiar from SL, and it gives some good insight into goon methods and racist fucktard attitudes. (Also you should read it because you know the only Lindens who will read it are probably members). Following is a typical exchange from the SA forums:

How big is the goon presence here? How many of you are planning on sticking around after this whole “W-hat vs Grid” incident is done with? If I start playing, would it be wise not to associate myself as a goon just as yet for fear of reprisal? Do I have to play a furry? What are the fees like in this game, I keep saying people mention that they’re buying things, is this with in-game currency or with actual cash?

1) Goon presence is pretty massive, especially at Gallii for the moment, where it seems the majority of goons have, if you will, “defected” to as their new home. People don’t recognize us in Gallii as w-hats just yet because most haven’t tied SA with w-hat.

2) I’d say virtually nobody will disappear after this grid incident; if anything, new goons will always come along to take the place of goons long departed. I drop by every so often.

3) Associate yourself with goons and be proud of it, always. You are automatically better than 99% of the population in the game, in my opinion. Just don’t do anything to get yourself banned and you’ll do fine.

4) No, you don’t have to be a furry.

5) No fees required to sign up. The ingame currency is L$, which you can either receive by selling items you’ve made, or through some 3rd party website where you purchase about L$1000 for roughly $4.00.

32 Responses to “Something Awful Goons Plan SL Infiltration/Invasion”

  1. no

    Oct 31st, 2005

    you should read this one too . . . . . . .

    and maybe this one

    yeah, those guys in gallii sure are stealth w-hatters

  2. Marsellus Wallace

    Oct 31st, 2005

    Not very stealthy if they give away these details if you ask me.. Better than 99% of the players? Why? They are not making any substantial income.. They aren’t on the leader boards last I checked.. I’m confused, what makes them better? Oh wait, that’s right.. Not a damn thing but their apparent ability to grief.

    I am especially good at griefing (probably better than W-Hats) once I put my mind to it. I wouldn’t say that makes me better than most of the population. Maybe a little bit more aware of what can take place.. Anyway, just my 2 cents.. ANYONE can take down a server.. ANYONE. Doesn’t take any special skill. Any moron who tries programming and messes up in his scripting could accidently or purposely take down the server. Does that make that person better than anyone else? No.

    However, it does make that person look good to a select few number of players who more than likely have social problems in real life and have those carrry over most likely in game. Mommy didn’t hug them enough, or maybe daddy hugged them too much.. Who knows. Frankly.. Who cares?

    I know sure fire way to handle individuals like this. Don’t promote their activities. It gives them a spotlight. While it won’t end all of the anctics by these people, and would probably encourage them to try something bigger, but in the long run if you don’t give their ‘missions’ light they loose footing. They can’t give the article to another player and go see, this is who we are and what we do and we are infamous for it. I challenge the Herald to black list the W-Hats. Do not report on them, and then watch them squirm. Granted I don’t expect the Herald to do this as they want this to happen (except maybe Walker after reading his anger in the last story he did on them lol) as it is news they can report on, but still as a social experiment it should be tried.

    If terrorists were not read about daily in newspapers, would there message spread as fast and would people be as scared? It would undermine the terrorists basic ability… To terrorize.

    Marsellus Wallace
    aka JC Soprano

  3. Devlin Gallant

    Oct 31st, 2005

    Don’t knock the W-Hats so much, after all they are a sub-group of AKA Sociopaths Anonymous.

  4. RB

    Nov 1st, 2005

    Does the W in W-HATS stand for Wanker by any chance?

    - RB.

  5. Shrike

    Nov 1st, 2005

    It could be worse, at least they aren’t a bunch of 50-year old virgins.

  6. laf

    Nov 1st, 2005

    “It gives them a spotlight.”

    Kind of like three articles about them in a row on this website am I rite.

  7. Fenrisulfr Mounier

    Nov 1st, 2005

    w-hats more like ass-hats hahahhaha

  8. Amaya

    Nov 1st, 2005

    Ok, Seriously. Are you fucking insane? Just because one person fucked up doesn’t mean all of that persons friends are asshats too. The people of SL are so fucking lame I can’t even get over it. Get laid or something. Loosen up a bit. You took this way out of context. Re-read it. Drink some beer or something. Do fucking something.

  9. Louis Neutra

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    Cool, thanks for quoting my post in your article! We goons are automatically 99% better than any generic SL user because we don’t consider the game our “second life”, like some SL users. Marsellus, I find it hilarious that you’re going off about being able to “grief better” than w-hatters; the majority of goon’s goals is not to grief, you know. Hope that pretentious attitude works out for you.

    Don’t you know you’re just calling more attention to w-hat and SA goons by posting retarded articles like this? You’re simply adding fuel to the fire. Grouping us as people with “racist, fuckard attitudes” makes you just as stupid as us. Marsellus said it best:

    “I know sure fire way to handle individuals like this. Don’t promote their activities. It gives them a spotlight.”

    That’s exactly what these articles do. Congratulations.

  10. Louis Neutra

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    “It could be worse, at least they aren’t a bunch of 50-year old virgins.”

    OH SNAP, you’re my new best friend.


    Nov 2nd, 2005

    You people are obsessed with SA. Do you understand that the majority of SA doesnt care at all about any of you or SL? Do you understand how small you are compared to us? Do you have any understanding at all of how stupid you all look posting your stories about what you think we are, over and fucking over? Do you? Do any of you have enough of a life outside of your computer to understand that you people have literally made a mountain out of a molehill. You people are fucking stupid and you’re all running around in the dark.

  12. Plastic Duck

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    This is a very accurate and true article infact we’ve already drawn up schematics and with a few small changes to our master invasion plan everything will be perfect and finalized. We plan on deploying our new grief technology on Nov 11 (We chose Remembrance day because it is funny just like 9/11 and dead hookers lol!) and if all goes according to plan the SL servers will implode and any PC with the SL client installed will melt down and it will smell like strawberries (they are the favorite fruit of over 70% of w-hats).

    Also our new grief technology (dubbed GriefCylinder, in memory of Octobers GriefSphere) includes many yet to be discovered exploits found in the new 1.7 client such as the ability to execute nonarbitrary code in the LSL language (we are working on a way to execute arbitrary code and would like to include that in the future planned GriefTorus) and some optimization hacks which allow us to spawn the grief objects up to 30% faster (we removed some llSleeps from the grief code we stole it was kind of hard but I am a pretty good scripter!).

    So long SL, soon you will all regret ever crossing paths with Plastic Duck!

  13. Neonaer

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    I fail to see what’s so terribly offensive about the exchange presented in the article. New guy asks some questions, new guy gets questions answered. Hell, he even gets told to avoid getting banned, ie not grief.

    Yes, the 99% comment is as elitist as it sounds. That poster does in fact dislike a large percentage of SL’s population. A sizible portion of W-hat plays SL for the creative content and the goon humor, and thus see the rest of SL as annoying neighbors. However, it’s not really any of your buiness who they like or dislike, is it?

    PS “W-hat” is just “what” with a hypen in it. It’s visal pun translated back into text. It would be a great metaphor if it wasn’t totally meaningless.

    PSS I find the use of fuck in the text of a serious article to be highly unprofessional.

  14. Ryen

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    Sorry guys can’t talk now engineering a NEW way to bring the grid down!

  15. Captain Crunch

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    Actually, I’ve found a kernel exploit that works with the version of Linux they’re using. I’ve successfully managed to use that exploit to have my VMware-based Linux image shit all over itself and format itself. The needed ports on SL’s servers are open, too. New comedy coming to SL pretty soon. xD

  16. Louis Neutra

    Nov 2nd, 2005


  17. TrannyPet Barmy

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    “I’ve successfully managed to use that exploit to have my VMware-based Linux image shit all over itself and format itself”

    is that some form of technical description that every one should now PH33R ? Oh wait, ‘kernel’, ‘exploit’ and ‘Linux’ are all in there to – no really, PH33R H1m 4 H3 1z L337C0r3 HaxxZ0r !!!!


    TrannyPet Barmy

  18. Marsellus Wallace

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    See, you guys don’t know me that well. True I don’t know you that well either. In fact, I don’t want to know you or care to know you. This is what I do. I tear people up on the boards. I’ll make you cry to your mommy about how you got handled on the boards. But, I’ll amuse you. It’s been awhile since someone was brave enough to try and bash me on the boards.. Brings back old memories of when I made National (not just Herald) headlines and I would see similar posts like this.. *wipes nostalgic tear away*

    ANYWAY Louis… So you’re better becuase you don’t consider the game to be your second life. So with that argument it is your first life meaning you seriously need a real life and are in fact not better than 99% of players. Your words, not mine.

    As for the majority of goons or whatever you call yourself not griefing, thats fine I never said that if you reread my post. As for what I said about ignoring you guys on these stories, I’m glad you agree with me. Maybe your not as stupid as your coming off on here. Calm down a bit and don’t take things so personally. It’s just a game remember? Oh wait that’s right… It’s your first life not your second life, my bad.

    Neonaer, I actually enjoyed your post and agree with you 100%. I walk people through how to get around bans all the time, does that make me a griefer or mean I am a bad person? No it does not. And yes, I find fuck in an article to be unprofessional unless it’s a quote, but then again this is an adult forum (see disclaimer on main page).

    I’ve been in the same boat as the W-Hat’s. You guys (w-hats, goons ,etc) think I am trying to bash you, but in fact I am trying to help you indirectly. Sure there was some minor bashing, but ultimately I am in the same boat with you guys. Go to the side press stories and read about JC Soprano (me) and The Sim Mafia. Most of the press stories (real ones, not herald ones) make me out to be some dickhead griefer regardless of my goals or intentions. Instead of lashing back and making myself look retarded like you guys did, I defended and explained my actions in detail and I worded it so the people who automatically dislike someone named griefer, could understand, relate and possibly sympathize. This is how you win peoples minds and hearts.

    You guys have the skills, I’ll give you that. Beleive it or not I do have some respect for you, not much, but some. You guys could be so much more if you took a step back and watch what you say. Loose lips sink ships. Anyway, feel free to reply back. I am sure at least one of you (Probably Louis lol) will reply back trying to bash me. Good luck with that and I look forward to replying.

    Marsellus Wallace
    Weeeeee!!! This is fun!

    P.S. A real griefer doesn’t talk about what he plans on doing, a real griefer just does it. Those who talk about it are whiners, not griefers. Keep that in mind.

  19. Question

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    I am a more, super, uber griefer than SA because I don’t talk and I can crash grids by just blinking my eyes.

    P.S.: W-hat’s sarcasm guys?

  20. internet

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    Starts to masturbate

  21. boo parks

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    anyone who says oh snap is a fucktard loser ummm well most everyone in sl is a loser id say maybe im the only one who is not! Yes I am the only cool person in all of sl. Yes I am the best everyone else can suck a hot one.

  22. Someone

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    Marsellus, you are so fucking stupid. Get over yourself. You are the biggest attention whore ever. Get a fucking life. I don’t give 2 fucks about the sim mafia or any of the stupid ass things you’ve done. I guess you don’t understand humor or sarcasm? Oh, and anyone who would cry over any pathetic thing you say deserves to be lined up and shot into a ditch.

  23. Louis Neutra

    Nov 2nd, 2005

    No SL resident understands goon mentality, period. SA goons are their own subgroup, in every game we play.

  24. Marsellus Wallace

    Nov 3rd, 2005

    Why do you insist on hiding behind an anonymous name? I understand humor and sarcasm.. Let me know when you’re funny and I’ll try to remember to laugh a bit. LOL See! =)

    Marsellus Wallace
    Attention Whore? That the best you can do?

    P.S. Boo you crack me up! lol

  25. Tasty Tapioca

    Nov 3rd, 2005

    ah dammit. I say ‘oh snap’ sometimes. x.x

  26. boo parks

    Nov 3rd, 2005

    lol I crack myself up im sick of louis neutra everytime i see that name i think of louis from revenge of the nerds.

  27. Neal Stewart

    Nov 5th, 2005

    Lowtax’s speech at the University of Illinois: 107 MB .wmv file
    Mirror 1 & Mirror 2.

  28. :O

    Nov 7th, 2005

    you guys are fucked now

  29. Bob Dobbs

    Dec 2nd, 2005

    Re comment #27, you’ll be wanting to download that file from mirror 2, which is SomethingAwful’s own server. Of course, if too many people did that, it would probably push SomethingAwful’s bandwidth costs up, so don’t everybody go and download this file all at once, or anything. I mean, we wouldn’t want to push up SA’s bandwidth charges, that would be terrible

  30. I hate Second Life

    Jan 26th, 2007

    I am leaving SL forever. Its not because of w-hats, or sa, or anything other than Lindens inability to make a decent game work. Im sick of: liason lindens abusing admin rights, griefers/liasons that pretend they arent, griefers of course, constant crashing/shitty performance constantly when above 20k players, loss of items I paid for, loss of money when I sold my lindens, and complete loss of ability to even check my account status due to asking questions about my problem….. My son was sexually harrassed and griefed in a PG SANDBOX, when I got on and attacked the person back, hmmmm what do you know a linden showed up and gave a warning LIASON SPIKE LINDEN TO BE EXACT… After getting a warning and discussing the pervert that assaulted my 11 year old son, the point was moot. So then I chime in on, “hey why didnt my money go from my sl account to my bank account when I sold $95 US dollars worth”, he tells me to contact billing, I say “ok then why did I only get $2000 for reffering someone instead of the promised $2500?

    CAN YOU BELIEVE IT HE FREAKING KICKED ME OFF…. SOME HELP THAT WAS, VERY INDICITIVE OF LINDENS IF YOU ASK ME, ASK THE WRONG QUESTION AND YOU GET SHUT OUT. I cant even sell the last of my money! I went to and it wont even let me into my account which still has lots of money in it! All this for asking a question about my loss of a pretty substantial amount of money. I dont know about you but I will never spend another cent on this shitty half assed game. Sure I loved it a year ago, and I liked it 6 months ago, now its worthless once LESS THAN 1 out of every 100 of the registered people are online!? 2.8 million people registered/25,000 online=shit!? WTF would happen if lets say 50,000 got online, GAME OVER. not to mention all the losses that lindens simply pretend didnt happen, or lets just say they absorbed it. All I need to know is in the first paragraph of the TOS it clearly says that you are paying for fake money when you invest in SL, it also says it reserves the right to take it all without any recourse. So if you think that one day SL wont crash for good you are sadly mistaken and the jerks will make off with your money faster than you can say secondlife sucks my ass. Good luck trying to get it back, it will not happen.

  31. Just a thought

    Jan 26th, 2007

    did you ever consider the fact that you attacked a griefer/pervert, something that is also against the terms of service MIGHT just be the reason for getting locked out? did you stop to consider that the Linden you spoke to does not handle account information and that continually asking such questions after being told which department to check with could be considered harassment?

    No, of course you didn’t. You’re the sort of person that would have complained to the wrong department of ANY service you use … and then bitch when that service is revoked.

    Don’t retaliate against any sort of Griefer aside from sending in the required reports, don’t harass the staff in the wrong departments about things they cannot answer or help you with and MAYBE you’ll find that this won’t happen again.

  32. BloodRose Valencia

    Jun 26th, 2007

    It doesnt take half of a brain to crash the grid. Physics + rezlag = doom. Simple. Dont try to make yourself out to be a genius, its unbecoming. Try to act mature about these posts, please. “starts to masturbate” is hardly relevant to the topic. Personally, I beleive anti-greifing (i.e. taking down greifers forcibly) has become an almost necessary part of our SL lives. And it will continue to be so until Lindens decide that the current abuse report system is inefficient (which it is) and they replace it with something more usable. Tools for anti-greifing are available at almost any weapons store, such as SEC, or AubreTEC. The technology is even available that you can protect your land from greifing in general! (besides the ban tool)Of course these things cost L$, but then again, what doesnt?
    The ultimate noobs here are the W-hats and other similar greifers, simply because they start it. But what I’m simply suggesting is to well enough equipt yourself so you are capable of ENDING it. I submit to you, that if every (non-greifer) SL avatar was equipt well enough to defend themselves from such things, there wouldnt be a greifer population AT ALL. Or at least a signifigantly reduced number of them. Whats the point in being a greifer if you cant greif?
    It is unfortunate that we have a certain ‘poverty level’ population in SL, but honestly, it cannot be helped. So, if your wallet is willing, I suggest you head over to your local AubreTEC or SEC store. Get what you need, and stop whining. If you DONT have the necessary L, there are always freebies. “Lokis non-physical rezzer” is one. It uses some of the more sophisticated non-physical technology of our time. But even better, the SCU System available from SEC comes with a personal non-physical hoverpad. This however is slightly more expensive, because of the systems high quality scripting.
    If you feel so inclined to learn more about what YOU can do to protect yourself, IM me, BloodRose Valencia, inquiring about this article.


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