The Alphaville Herald

Get a Life – Readers Sound Out, Most are Angry

by Pixeleen Mistral on 04/12/06 at 5:22 pm

by Heartun Breaker, syndicated advice columnist.

DEAR READERS:

I get a lot of mail about this column, and not all of it is flattering or from fans. I thought I would allow my fans and detractors to have some voice in this space by collecting for you some of what they say.

As is my custom with this column, all ‘real’ names have been changed to something witty or expressive — mostly to protect the privacy of the writers.

Enjoy.

~ HEARTUN BREAKER

GOREAN GOOD GIRL

When you told Gorean Good Girl (Get A Life, Oct. 30, 2006) to ‘embrace your inner whore, or stay out of Gor‘ you show that your (sic) really ignorant of Gorean custom and tradition. The love between a slave and a Master is a beautiful one of give and take, learning and teaching. Your (sic) really showing your intolerance too. ~ MASTER TIMMY

Gor haters like you should just get over it. ~ MASTER BOBBY

Tal Sister. Have you even read any of the Gor books? ~ MASTER SKIPPY

You CLAIM that Chili Con Furry (Get A Life, Oct. 30, 2006) asked you a question in Spanish and you translated it using Altavista Babelfish. But I put what you allege was his translated question into Babelfish, translated it from English to Spanish, then Spanish to Portuguese, then Portuguese to Italian and finally Italian back to English and it made no sense at all. I don’t think you used Babelfish. More than that, I don’t think anyone IM’d you that question in the first place. I think you just made it up. You are no better than Jason Blair. ~ SCOOBIE DOO

¿Usted habla español? Vete a la mierda. Ha ha ha. ~ FRITO BANDITO

How the hell do you expect us to believe you when you tell people like Burned in SL (Get A Life, Oct. 30, 2006) to lie? As if there isn’t (sic) enough liars in SL already! What a two-faced bitch you must be IRL!!! I’m never reading the SL Herald again. If I had a subscription, I would revoke it! ~ PISSED OFF PRINCESS

That’s some sneeky shit. I never thought about that. I had no idea what the Notes section (of the Profile) was for. ~ HONEST DUMB GUY

Why would you do that? You are helping bring down the already low moral bar in Second Life. The Lindens should BAN you! ~ GOBSMACKED PATRIOT

Unofficially, the notes section of the resident Profile is NOT to keep track of lies. It is to keep track of things like I.O.U’s and property or group agreements. Don’t use my name or I will get in trouble. ~ ANONNYMOUS LINDEN

You just helped griefers out everywhere. Thanks a lot, bitch! And I DARE you to print this! Stupid whore. ~ HOLY ROLLER

Unequal Partner (Get A Life, Nov. 4, 2006) was reaching out to you with the pain she is experiencing in her ‘triangular’ relationship. You told her to try to make it work, but she will never get her Master to respect her the way she needs. You gotta tell her to cut loose and go out on her own. The ‘Sub Dude’ clearly has the upper hand. ~ NEGATIVE McNASTY

Triangular Relationship?” LOL. Only in SL (I hope). ~ SHELTERED DUDE

Unequal Partner sounds nice. I’d treat her right. Pass on my info to her. ~ MISTRESS HAHAHA

You need to print up T-shirts with phrases like ‘Triangular Relationship’ on them. I’d buy one. ~ TRIANGULAR LOVER

Come on, Heartun. Don’t be so harsh on Need A Third Life (Get A Life, Nov. 4, 2006). I think most people in SL have a significant other in RL. That doesn’t mean everyone here will get divorced. You really take it too far some times. But you do often make me laugh too. ~ CHEATING BOSTRICH

I just went through a divorce for just this same shit that Need A Third Life is doing. Instead of telling him to run up his credit cards you should tell him to quit playing around and spend time with his family. What are you? Retarded? ~ NO IRONY GUY

LOL, do you get a commission from Dell? ~ CHA CHING

You were way too harsh on Madly In Love (Get A Life, Nov. 4, 2006). ~ LOVE REFEREE

You lesbians have no idea what it is like to have the absolute love of a man that some of us are lucky enough to find. Don’t give advice about stuff you don’t understand. True love is obviously beyond you, or you would have more compassion for this poor woman. ~ TOTAL LOVELIOT

Madly In Love needs to keep her SL in SL and her RL in RL. ~ SIMPLE LOVER

Hint. He is MARRIED!! ~ MS. DUH

What is wrong with roses and hearts? I, for one, <3 them. @)~- ~ LOVE CUTESTUFF

God, you are one heartless bitch! I wish we could still neg-rate people so I could track you down and hit you with a neg-rate. ~ ANGRY LOVER

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Get A Life is the most popular and widely syndicated advice column in Second Life — known for Heartun Breaker’s down to earth common sense and witty reason.

If you have a question for Get A Life just IM it to Heartun Breaker. Or send e-mail here: HeartunBreaker@hotmail.com. All submissions become the property of the Heartun Breaker. We reserve the right to edit submissions for brevity and clarity. No ‘real’ SL names will be published. No part of this service may be reproduced in any form without the express written permission of Heartun Breaker, except that an individual may download and/ or forward articles via e-mail to a reasonable number of recipients for personal, non-commercial purposes.