Lively Lesbian Subtext to Google’s 3D Chatrooms?

by Alphaville Herald on 28/07/08 at 9:09 am

Google’s Lively “Heather” & “Vanessa” Avatars Can’t Dance With Boys
Fighting breaks out in Jen’s Coffee House

by Pixeleen Mistral, International Affairs desk


I have enjoyed my time in Lively so far, but there are parts of the experience I find troubling – I simply cannot dance with irishJohn36. I met irishJohn36 in Jen’s Coffee House, and after sitting chatting with him and another guy named “Photographer”, irishJohn36 suggested we get up and dance.

“Photographer” had been IMing me privately asking for photos – I sent him some links to Pixeleen Mistral pictures I found using in Google’s image search — after all, when in Google, do as the Googles do. But “Photographer” wanted much more for his collection and was getting rather insistent and tiresome. IrishJohn36 seemed to be a bit more of a gentleman, and I hadn’t danced with anyone yet, so I stood up from my chair and clicked on irishJohn36′s avatar to bring up a list of animations I could perform with him. Strangely, dance was not listed – but slap was.

Very soon, a nimbus of guys appeared around me, as irishJohn36, “Photographer”, and others started punching, kicking, and dropping anvils on each other, leaving me at the center of a vortex of virtual testosterone violence. That was when irishJohn36 suggested we find another scene to try to dance.

Once we got to a less violent club, I tried to dance again, but no matter what I tried, the dance animation never appeared when I clicked on irishJohn36′s avatar.

Eventually I had a rendezvous with irishJohn36 and his friend Finola on a quiet island, where the mystery was solved.

Why can’t girls dance with boys?

Finola: any idea why we can’t dance with men?
Finola: I can only dance with women…
Pixeleen.Mistral: really?

Finola: yeah.
Pixeleen.Mistral: you are right!

Finola: Yeah, let me know if you do find you can
I have determined my avatar is a lesbian or just hates men
Pixeleen.Mistral: I can dance with you – but not with IrishJohn!
irishJohn36: hahaha

Finola and Pixeleen.Mistral move to the beat
Pixeleen.Mistral: this is sooooo weird
irishJohn36: well ladies….will i leave you two alone ;)
Finola: lol

irishJohn36: so pixeleen…you have some good moves
Pixeleen.Mistral: now I do
Finola: only cause she was dancing with me

Pixeleen.Mistral and Finola move to the beat
Finola: other women can dance with men
irishJohn36: get a room ;)

Finola: I can dance alone or withe or other people that are not men
btw I like your shirt Pix
irishJohn36: other people that are not men…as in women ;)
Finola: yea. I think some animals. so this girl must of been really pissed at men

girls with “Heather”-based avatars can dance with other Heathers

After Finola and I got done dancing I did some experimentation and found that girls can only dance with girls if you choose the “Heather” avatar as your base type. Apparently Heather is a man-hater. Later I discovered that the “Vanessa” avatar also only dances with girls, but busty “Jane Doe” is totally guy-friendly. Are the designers of Lively sending some sort of subliminal message here? No dancing without a D-cup?

boys are strictly prohibited –click on irishJohn36 and there is no dancing

12 Responses to “Lively Lesbian Subtext to Google’s 3D Chatrooms?”

  1. JimBean

    Jul 28th, 2008

    I hope you realize Pix, you’ll never be able to come back to SL without revealing yourself as the asswipe hypocrite you are.

    I’m so happy you guys are moving to Lively. When does the blog get a name change?

  2. California Condor

    Jul 28th, 2008

    Like software companies frequently say, “That’s not a bug, it’s a feature!”. Can’t you hear the outcries coming out early for this virtual world? By the way, is “Lively” a code word for some other kind of lifestyle. Oh, so that’s what the L word means!

  3. Alyx Stoklitsky

    Jul 28th, 2008

    Lively is even duller than SL.

  4. lawl

    Jul 28th, 2008

    More shit no one cares about from our favorite fake e-journalist

  5. haha

    Jul 28th, 2008

    No one cares about lively. Good to see you are insignificant, and finally realizing it.

  6. RossenX

    Jul 28th, 2008

    Hah i know Fin and John, and yeah alot of guys can’t dance with girl NOT just heather, so get your facts right [= i “Logan” can’t dance with “heather” or “vanessa” but i can with “Jane Doe” and all the others i think. So it’s just a bug, i’m sure that all the avatars arne’t gay…

  7. Eye Korobase

    Jul 28th, 2008

    Third Life anyone?

  8. Sigmund Leominster

    Jul 28th, 2008

    Maybe it’s just me, but there’s a terrible and crushing irony in calling the new place “Lively.” I spent a week there during a 30 minute period before crashing. Nice to know that the crash is not just an SL phenomenon. Personally, any virtual world that doesn’t allow for a little “jiggy jig boom boom, wham bam, thank you ma’am” with the help of Xcite(TM) products is doomed.

    I waited for the dancing penises – but they never arrived ;(

  9. parrhesian

    Jul 29th, 2008

    Apparently Pixeleen DOES aspire to write for real life tabloids!


  10. Just Me

    Jul 29th, 2008

    I gave Lively a try …. despite my pc being rock solid on SL, Lively crashed me repeatedly … what little I did see wasn’t very impressive, tho, I’ll say that

  11. FAIL

    Jul 29th, 2008

    Lively is actually lamer than THERE–and that’s saying a lot!

  12. JimBean

    Aug 1st, 2008

    I just got this message from one of the other virtual worlds (LeapIn):

    To address a known hardware defect affecting a specific model of
    MacBook Pro computer (using a GeForce 8600m GT with 128 MB of VRAM),
    those models are automatically reduced to a “Safe Mode” quality setting
    (setting “2″) before entering.

    WOW. I guess the Second Life viewer is SO BAD, it’s ruining other virtual worlds on the MacBook too!

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