Herald Survives Day in DNS Hell

by Alphaville Herald on 30/07/10 at 4:38 am

Domain name denied — trusted servers play SERVFAIL card

A pair of rogue domain name servers have been stripped of their authoritative status and permanently banished from the Herald DNS registration after putting the alphavilleherald.com site through a nightmarish ordeal of DNS lies and deception that rendered the newspaper inaccessible to growing numbers of readers as the misinformation spread across the entire interwebs.

With both the Herald editrix and technical staff in transit to the Metaverse Meetup, the crazed DNS servers’ sneak attack could not have come at a more unfortunate time.

Distraught readers wailed in frustration at being denied access to the most authoritative, incisive, vital and virtual newspaper in the metaverse. Some wondered how they would wrap their pixelated fish. Fears mounted as widespread reports circulated that virtual bird cages were being left unlined. Others noted that several puppies are still not totally housebroken – all due to the shocking silence by a pair of formerly well-behaved DNS servers.

Could this have been part of a bizzare Second Life Gorean cult’s BDSM-inspired DNS dominance game? Did Linden Lab finally decide enough is enough on the eve of Philip Linden’s faux town hall meeting? Or is a shadowy conspiracy of anti-technocomunists,  black hats, 4chan, and the illuminati to blame? Perhaps Audrey from typesetting has been moonlighting and ‘cleaning up’ certain zone files?

We may never know the whole truth, but this query result may provide a clue

————
QUESTIONS:
alphavilleherald.com, type = A, class = IN
ANSWERS:
AUTHORITY RECORDS:
ADDITIONAL RECORDS:
————
** server can’t find alphavilleherald.com: SERVFAIL
 

Once alerted to the problem, the Herald’s Mysterio Sinister said, "I’ll show you a SERVFAIL, sucker" and immediately updated the Herald’s DNS name registration to use more reliable servers — a heroic rescue of the paper from a horrific ordeal.

29 Responses to “Herald Survives Day in DNS Hell”

  1. James Freud

    Jul 30th, 2010

    I guess this is another one of those joke articles, right?

  2. Danziel Lane

    Jul 30th, 2010

    Nope, James, for me the Herald was off all day long.

    No fun, no jokes, no Pixeleen, no Pappy, no ranting about griefer groups, no grrrrls, no nothing.

    Boring.

    I really had to do my job!

    I am happy the Herald is back on.

  3. pefton

    Jul 30th, 2010

    it was fun while it lasted

  4. I ordered 10 humans vivissected, I was so knotted with rage at the loss of my lulz.

  5. marilyn murphy

    Jul 30th, 2010

    i got the vapors and fainted into a seductive pose on mah bed. then i got bored.

  6. Persephone Bolero

    Jul 30th, 2010

    And the Alphaville Herald rose from the ashes to give a voice to the oppressed SL community, living under the greedy thumb of evil capitalists, who sit in their full sims looking down upon the those in their Linden Homes and laughing with contempt. And liberals across the grid looked upon their Herald and saw that it was good.

    The rest of us shrugged and went about our lives.

  7. Little Lost Linden

    Jul 30th, 2010

    When I noticed the problem with the Herald, I immediately called Microsoft. They told me they were working on the issue as quickly as humanly possible. As for myself, there was nothing more I could do, so I went back to counting bots and eating marmalade.

  8. Emperor Norton hears a who?

    Jul 30th, 2010

    You know this one of those moments were words fail. I mean I try to give a shit, but I can’t

    *sigh*

  9. Darien Caldwell

    Jul 30th, 2010

    It certainly was a scary experience. At first I thought maybe the IT dept. here at work had blocked the site. But when I got home, and found it still wouldn’t resolve, I knew something terrible had happened.

    I immediately sounded the alarm at SLU and the helpful people there launched a full scale investigation, the likes of which hasn’t been seen since Monica Lewinsky’s blue dress surfaced. The ultimate conclusion? The DNS had been deported by the INS. So much for hosting in Phoenix.

  10. Pappy Enoch

    Jul 31st, 2010

    I were so hurt I done bribed the jailer and got rite drunk. While I were passed out, the Herald done come back in all her glory.

    There am justice in this poor cruel fake ol’ world.

  11. Tux

    Jul 31st, 2010

    I IM’d Kalel Venkman of the JLU (I thought if anyone would know he would), he replied in private voice:

    ‘Muahahahaha’ – cat purring in background!

    At first I thought it was Dr Evil or someone. But then I realised Kalel himself would celebrate this sort of thing. In fact it wouldn’t surprise me if he made up some fantasy about contacting the FBI and using his super reputation had them take out the Herald.

    Still, I am glad its back.

  12. Danziel Lane

    Jul 31st, 2010

    @Pappy:
    “I were so hurt I done bribed the jailer and got rite drunk.”

    Pappy … with what did you bribe him?
    As I see on the photos, you have nothing left but a barrel.
    What else could you have given to him?

    So I am really scared … what will the photos of the next article about your trial reveal to us?

  13. Wolf Baginski

    Jul 31st, 2010

    I’m afraid my reaction is “So what?”

  14. Nelson Jenkins

    Jul 31st, 2010

    @ Wolf Baginski

    I’m afraid my reaction is “Why did you care enough to post?”

  15. Monkeymoo

    Aug 1st, 2010

    I don’t care – and I’ll tell you why. Where has The Herald been for the last few months? There was the massive (still ongoing) borked search fiasco… the Lindens have outsourced customer support and tickets are taking five weeks, and King Philip gave a speech a couple of days ago…
    So wuts in the Herald? Some grrr girls (or something) and a load of self indulgent boring crap about themselves.
    Come on Herald! Get a grip! You had a real edge once (when you bothered to report on real stories). Now you’re just like some dull fashionista blog.

  16. Ted

    Aug 1st, 2010

    It was truly terrible. I witnessed the no herald page found.

    The herald down, and the birds having to live in utter mire with the bird poop just piling up. Two major atrocities that should have never happened. Appalling indeed.

  17. Gaara Sandalwood

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    Personally I have no consideration in this sense. It’s not what the Herald is that motivates this but the fact that in general DoS attacks like this are just plain assholish, that makes me say this: That was just plain assholish.

  18. Al the Pretender

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    i was happy……

  19. It's Unfixable

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    Tux, you and the others actually believe the tripe you fabricate. Amazing.

    DDoS attack, was it then? I was frankly hoping the place had finally gone under. No ads since Nov ’09, so what’s keeping it afloat?

  20. It's Unfixable

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    Or DNS attack bleh. Whatever.

    Pro tip: Nobody especially likes you.

  21. Wyrdwolf Legion

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    Assholish…
    Good word!
    I wonder what the definition in the Oxford (or Websters) English dictionary would like like.

    The Urban dictionary describes it thus:-

    “Acting like an asshole. To be an asshole in nature.
    ‘You are being a selfish assholish bastard’.”

    Who said the Herald didn’t educate?

  22. Darien Caldwell

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    Good to see everything is back to normal here. *smirk*

  23. Wyrdwolf Legion

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    @ Its Unfixable

    As usual, you are wrong.

    I like Tux…

    Perhaps your pro tip was a “Note to self”?

  24. It's Unfixable

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    That makes one of you. If Tux actually had any friends, he wouldn’t hang out in one of four sims, and spend all his time desperately scanning the Herald for hints that he’s being doxxed.

  25. Tux

    Aug 2nd, 2010

    @Unfixable

    ‘Tux, you and the others actually believe the tripe you fabricate. Amazing.’

    Lol no, what is amazing is I, and others, actually fabricate the tripe you read. And we waste precious moments of your obviously otherwise bland existence!

  26. Gaara Sandalwood

    Aug 3rd, 2010

    “DDoS attack, was it then? I was frankly hoping the place had finally gone under. No ads since Nov ‘09, so what’s keeping it afloat?”

    “Or DNS attack bleh. Whatever.

    Pro tip: Nobody especially likes you.”

    Protip: Lrn2network, and also to start hating yourself like a proper person of your caliber should.

  27. It's Unfixable

    Aug 3rd, 2010

    Just keep up the good work, Tux – you troll so very easily.

    You know, for a bunch of internet trolls, you guys troll embarrassingly well. It makes the rest of us trolls look bad. Did you ever stop to think that we’re not laughing with you, we’re laughing at you?

    Biggest single mass ban in SL history. That’s a record that will probably stand till the whole grid is smoke. What morons.

  28. Tux

    Aug 3rd, 2010

    @Unfixable

    ‘Biggest single mass ban in SL history. That’s a record that will probably stand till the whole grid is smoke. What morons.’

    Please, explain how this relates to this article or me (I am unsure as to whom it is directed at).

    ‘If Tux actually had any friends, he wouldn’t hang out in one of four sims, and spend all his time desperately scanning the Herald for hints that he’s being doxxed.’

    Four sims? XD

    Scanning the Herald? In fact I enjoy reading the Herald and occasionally like to comment. I certainly am not fussed what people say or think of me (anything recent is tame compared to what has been said in the past).

    After working all day, eating my evening meal and finally checking my email, I can then spend a few moments reading this site. Is that Ok? I am sorry if in my RL I have a proper job and cannot spend all my time here, like in your fantasy. XD

  29. Gaara Sandalwood

    Aug 3rd, 2010

    “No ads since Nov ‘09, so what’s keeping it afloat?”

    I almost forgot this: You realize, and I am just considering this is what you’re getting at here, that people can uh….host a website without ads?

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