Freespirit Crumb — Post 6 Grrrrl

by Alphaville Herald on 14/07/11 at 2:04 am

Freespirit Crumb was recommended to me by a friend of mine who said “[She] is probably the hottest hobo on the grid.” As I’ve seen quite a number of SL Hobos, all of them interesting avatars, I was especially interested in meeting a hot one. I was not disappointed, and she goes a lot beyond just good looks as you'll see. It is a great pleasure and an honor to introduce this week’s Post 6 Grrrrl, and our first Post 6 Hobo, Freespirit Crumb. ~Timothy Morpork]

Freespirit Crumb Final1

I like to live on my own terms. I have never brought a cent of my money into any online world, and I never will. I believe that there’s more than enough free stuff on this planet, the real one and the virtual ones, to keep me alive and happy. So I move from place to place, see the sights, and move on when I’m ready.

Ken and Barbie don’t interest me, never did. I like the one-eyed GI Joe and the rescue hero who’s missing an arm. Ken and Barbie like to talk about their Abercrombie encrusted souls fully confident that we care what they think, and prepared to whip up some drama when our interest in them lags. My GI Joe and battered rescue hero friends don’t need to make drama, they’ve survived the real thing. It’s hard to be bulimic when you don’t have enough to eat.

Freespirit Crumb Final2

That’s not to be heartless toward all the tweens and teens who suffer from self image issues and other crap that they picked up from television. Our society is creating them by the truckload and we will soon be a western world full of prescription pill zombies afraid to say or do anything original for fear of being judged. There was a lot less of this, I feel, before Big Pharm, of course, but also back when tweens and teens went to bed early by choice because they were exhausted from doing their chores on the farm, or working at the family business. Suburban life breeds assholes and angst. Kids- turn off the computer, go outside, volunteer somewhere. Tire yourself out. Living in your head and on your computer will just make you miserable.

So you read this and say “What a horrible bitch” or something. I don’t care. I’ve been given “usually a few paragraphs” by Timothy Morpork to speak to thousands of people, so I’m going to say something meaningful. It’s a nice system, I show you my tits and I get to talk to the masses. I may go long because I showed you my cunt too. Did you know that Word underlines cunt as misspelled, but not tits?

I think that Second Life is a magical place. I don’t spend as much time there as I like because I borrow internet access when I can so as to stay off the real grid as best I can. I have met a lot of wonderful people in-world and I cherish them all, but it took some searching, I must say.

Freespirit Crumb Final3

If I were the Lindens, I would offer people two big buttons when they first rez in-world. One button is shaped like a brain, the other button is shaped like tits. Whichever you choose, you won’t ever see anyone who chose the other as they are two separate grids. Not judging here, just saying I had to wade through several thousand guys hitting on me for every smart and genuine person I met here. We might like to shake our tits on the brainy grid too, but that’s not ALL we do.

So, I’m packing my bindle and getting ready to pad the hoof to the next good flop. Until I see you again, may you travel safe and carry the banner. I’m no Angellina, so while my name may be “crumb”, know that there ain’t none on me, so if you see me, let me call in to your fire, more than a few have said I’m blowed-in-the-glass. Peace.

14 Responses to “Freespirit Crumb — Post 6 Grrrrl”

  1. paul

    Jul 14th, 2011

    Shalom! =]

  2. James Freud

    Jul 14th, 2011

    ‘Bout time we had another Post 6! Let’s mix it up around here you crazy hipsters!

  3. Pappy Enoch

    Jul 14th, 2011

    “I would offer people two big buttons when they first rez in-world. One button is shaped like a brain, the other button is shaped like tits.”

    This am a first-rate idear. I knows whichaone I wood push.

    Ma’am, I are ready an’ able to be yo’ GI Joe Adventure Feller, the one with them Kung-Fu grippin’ hands.

  4. Orca Flotta

    Jul 15th, 2011


  5. Rock Ramona

    Jul 15th, 2011

    while for a few seconds i find this avie refreshing,the person soon ruins it all by becoming the anti cheerleader for her own side…….just when i was becoming mentally aroused…..cold hearted hobos anyways:(((

  6. Orca Flotta

    Jul 15th, 2011

    Interesting writeup. Mrs Crumb definately shows some brains here, which the majority of SLers unfortunately don’t do often enough.

  7. marilyn murphy

    Jul 15th, 2011

    i read some letters written by civil war union soldiers back to their families. i was greatly pleased to see how well they expressed themselves. the point you make is valid, concerning the children should do more than vacantly stare at a computer screen like i do. i think this is basically true about humans:: take any culture, expose them to this much mass media, give them instant gratification early and often, then a smaller percentage of humans will actually do productive things. oops, i am being all ayn rand. mcdonalds can be found at the foot of the himalyas. everyone is being stripped of culture. it will all become a homogenous blend of strip malls and fast food from moscow to beijing. notice how many of your friends are on some mood stabilizer?

  8. Nelson Jenkins

    Jul 15th, 2011

    @ marilyn murphy

    it will all become a homogenous blend of strip malls and fast food from moscow to beijing.

    Fine with me, there’s not much between Moscow and Beijing that interests me anyway. Unless you meant more than a straight line, since I can’t see the financial benefits of opening thousands of McDonalds restaurants in a line from Moscow to Beijing.

  9. Yep

    Jul 15th, 2011

    Go getem Tiger :D

  10. Orca Flotta

    Jul 16th, 2011

    I can’t see the financial benefits of opening thousands of McDonalds restaurants in a line from Moscow to Beijing.

    Are you kidding? On a route thru half of asia you’ll not only find some of the most breathtaking landscapes but also a lot, a very lot of rich people. Okay, you’ll find even more poor buggers, and those are exactly the people McD’s makes profit of.

  11. Orca Flotta

    Jul 16th, 2011

    … only that people in Asia, even the porest ones, are used to mudch better, more nutritious and definately more tasty food than McD’s can offer them.

  12. Yep

    Jul 16th, 2011

    In Asia it is more like McDog burgers.

  13. Oh Please

    Jul 16th, 2011

    How very priviliged and middle class of you, sitting at your computer telling people to get off their computers. Unless you are logging in from a dumpster on a Blackberry that you wired together yourself – with one arm – then you are no more legit an Urban Avenger than the everyday people you decry in your article.

    Sichoassdown, silly little pretentious white girl.

  14. JustMe

    Jul 16th, 2011

    Actually, there are McDonalds in Korea, Japan, and China .. and they are popular

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