The Alphaville Herald

141 Responses to “Evangeline: Interview with a Child cyber-Prostitute in TSO”

1. 

   triger_happy
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   what the hell are you ppl. talking about? this girl is my HERO. can we say, Stroke of Genios? *snikers*

   “Stroke” thats funny

   any way she took a time honored tradition and made it work in a whole diffrent world, now thats smarts
2. 

   Tribal-Bob
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   I think the saddest part is this “thing” is bragging about how they made in-game money for a simulator about… well, real life.

   /wonders how much this person could have made in the same amount of time IRL

   looser
3. 

   The Armchair Cynic
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   I feel as though I now have to leap to the defense of Penny Arcade for linking this site. Yes, it is inane. Yes, it is stupid. Yes, it is complete trash. It is also talking about something that is inane, stupid, and complete trash. This is what they are trying to convey, to the best of my knowledge. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I enjoyed today’s (Monday’s) comic, and this base and incredibly stupid individual (be it male, female or asexual being) is the inspiration, so I thank him/her/it for being incredibly stupid. They’re citing their sources, as any good author does. In any case, consider anything that Penny-arcade links “Suggested Reading.” If you don’t like it, don’t read it.

   As for the game itself, I don’t play the Sims, and I never intend to.

   As for the post, I find it amusing that everyone is making comments on the English skills of the journalist the thing that he’s interviewing. It’s an AOL IM conversation; do you really expect them to use proper grammar and spelling? I know precious few people who do. Sure, he could have condensed it into a structured and orderly article, but that’s time-consuming and annoying, and much of the effect is lost. I actually feel compelled to congratulate the journalist on his infinite patience in dealing with the thing. I would have snapped after the first couple of sentences.

   As for the thing, that’s just twisted, but it takes all kinds to make a world. Even the repulsive kinds.

   It saddens me when I consider that even this travesty is not the bottom of the barrel where human refuse is concerned. Surely, those who have endured this interview and kept their previous meal are blessed with fortitude.
4. 

   urizenus
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   Hey all, lots of issues here, only some of which I am able to discuss, and then only in the abstract.

   The Alphaville Herald interview with Evangeline was part of a study I am doing on the history of political and social formations within TSO. I was interested in the way that griefers can lead to the formation of user-based social and political institutions like Alphaville’s Sim Shadow Government. I certainly don’t suppose that anything Evangeline claimed to have done was illegal, nor do I even suppose that it is wrong. I am not calling for anyting to be done. I am just doing raw interviews at this point and recording what these characters say. I understand that the content may have been an embarassment to Maxis, and this is perhaps what lead to the termination of my account, but I cannot help that.

   So again, this interview is not being offered as “Journalism” with a great big capital J. This is raw data that I am posting as I acquire it, principally for the benefit of researchers that work on these topics.

   Take it for what you want, but it is what it is. Just an interview with an avatar. Raw data.
5. 

   L337|<!|\|6
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   Even as “raw data” you could have taken the time to clean it up and put it into some semblance of order or continuity. It looks like you cut and pasted the whole thing en-mass. If your going to write, publish, or present anything for public viewing, even if you want to preserve it in it’s “raw” form, at least put in a little effort to format it into something readable. This is just an example of laziness, or lack of talent. I am going with laziness mostly because the author’s post had some degree of intelligence.
6. 

   Eltolad
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   ***Let me get this straight***

   You all are picking over every detail of an IM conversation over someone who “whores” herself and/or others in an online enviornment. I read about half of your posts, and this is what I’ve realized:

   1. It’s not worth arguing over – the moral decay of society is not big news. I for one, don’t care for it(overall moral decay), but this person obviously doesn’t care what you think about her, because she’s making money anyway – real or virtual.

   2. Sure, left unchecked, it could be a problem – of course the parents should check in on their kid a little more often. But then again, has the thought ever occured to you that this person *might* acually be a 40 yr old man, acting like a 15 yr old girl online?

   3. Sure, we all feel “stupider” – but now that you’ve read all of it, instead of complaining about how stupid you feel, learn something from it. Realize that you should check on your kids, when you have them (again, asuming this *is* a real 15 yr old). And next time, realize you don’t have to read every link on every page. The internet is a wonderful poral of useful information as well as extreemly unuseful. If you sense stupidity *stop reading.*

   4. Multiple personalities and “evil” – if you want something much more intelegent to read, read “Three” by Ted Dekker. I believe his site is http://www.teddekker.com – you will enjoy it.
7. 

   L337|<!|\|6
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   I say this in the authors defense He/she was not the one who called this an “article”. I stand on my observations of it’s quality though.
8. 

   L337|<!|\|6
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   Why talk talk about it? Mostly, I’m bored.
9. 

   urizenus
   

   Dec 15th, 2003
   

   I don’t think you get the point L337|<!|\|6

   This is *raw data* that is being archived here for researchers in this area. I *could* clean it up, but that would be to corrupt the data.

   If you don’t like that, go to another site, or, even better, turn off your computer and read The Atlantic.
10. 

    L337|<!|\|6
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    Oh, I do get it though. You can format it without corrupting the data, but adding explanation, or breaking it up between the respective character perspective switches. Adding information to help explain some of the jargon for those of us that don’t play the game. Don’t blame me because you have no idea what your doing.
11. 

    Ryken
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    You guys are mad ’cause you didn’t think of it first.

    Losers. What fuckin’ losers you are. Jealousy pouring out your fuckin ears.
12. 

    urizenus
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    well, gee L337|<!|\|6, don’t blame me because I’m not doing what you *want* me to be doing. The data is what it is and it is there for serious researchers to organize as best fits their research needs. I’m not going to corrupt the data by formatting it to appease the aesthetic preferences of someone who just took the “Learn to write for the New Yorker” correspondence course.
13. 

    Ryken
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    Hey urizenus, do what you need to do. Ignore these loser, you got a job to do. So what if they don’t like it, or agree? They CAN read something else. But they choose not to, and why? Because they have NOTHING BETTER TO DO IN THEIR PATHETIC LIVES. You have your research, and I respect that…they don’t. They would rather trash some one else’s life because they can’t get past the fact that they still live in their parents basements.
14. 

    Crazy
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    My favorite part was when she’d say “(speaking as Granny)” or whatever and then talk in the same retarded white-suburbanite-kid-attempting-ghetto jive. This is comedic gold, which I will forget by the end of the night.

    And I’m giving up and caller her a “her”. There’s no way you can tell her real sex through that thick, opaque layer of stupid.
15. 

    L337|<!|\|6
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    I stand by what I said. You can actually improve the value of data by explaining the backround and jargon. I am not talking about aesthetics. I am merely pointing out that you are making no effort to improve the quality of your sources. You wouldn;t even need to change the body work itself, adding explanations at the end would suffice. Asside from that, your post is useless as research material. You have the date and time of the post, but not the interview itself. Also, your source is unconfirmed and FAR from reliable.
16. 

    Ryken
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    Who CARES what you think? You’re not doing this, are you? GET THE FUCK OFF HIS NUTS!!!
17. 

    L337|<!|\|6
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    I resent that remark! My parent’s do not HAVE a basement!
18. 

    Ryken
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    Then what? You sleep with your daddy? I wouldn’t doubt it. No wonder you’re so uptight. Point being, people like you don’t belong here. What people do with their time is their own thing. You’re absolutely NO ONE to judge in that respect. Don’t act like you’re so innocent yourself…you’ve looked at porn your fair share, I know you have because you’re posting HERE, of all places.

    Go away.
19. 

    l337|<!|\|6
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    I am merely stating my oppinions. By posting this on an open forum you open yourself up to the oppinions of others. Don’t get mad because I think your work is sub-par. If you don’t like negative feedback, don’t post. Actually, for the sake of intelligent minds everywhere you shouldn’t post, but again, that is only my oppinion.
20. 

    urizenus
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    Alright everyone, calm down. Criticism noted, replied to. Nothing to see here. Move along.
21. 

    l337|<!|\|6
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    Ryken, How did a debate over journalistic intent and the degree which you can add too/change a research source. Or whether said additions retrack or damage that sources validity spiral into base insults?
22. 

    L337|<!|\|6
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    Agreed, Urizenos.
23. 

    L337|<!|\|6
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    Pardon me, “Urizenus”. Sorry for the implied insult in mispelling your name, it wasn’t intended.
24. 

    polansk
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    WTF? looks like a very gayz!!!
25. 

    Your idiots?
    

    Dec 15th, 2003
    

    … Its a video Game called the Sims… Not called Idealist Utopia… If people want to take on the role of then let them. Its a Game… Not the fall of human as we watch ourselves get thrown out of the garden or eden. I dont play the sims but if I did i dont think it would be fun just being me… thats what real life is for…
26. 

    TwistedConcepts
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Ok, i do think its retarded, i do think thats its fucked up, i do think that the downfall of society is deffinatly being shown through a horrible cash cow like TSO… I never intended to go on it… It does sadden me to think now that some young 13 year old girl could be trying to play a damn game online and still some sick twisted 50 year old pervert could try get in her virtual pants or try to actually set up a real meeting. Partents in general dont watch there kids enough or understand what is out there on the net. Of all the crap TSO could have, i didnt think someone would actually waste there time to set up virtual brothels…. What the fuck.

    Just wanted to voice that and im sure alot of people feel the same way…however i totally agree that its a game and there shouldnt be restrictions as we are losing more and more rights every day. People are being thrown into fucking jail cells for smoking plants that come from the earth, selling there own bodies, which the government should have no say over what so ever, and LOOKING at someone. Welcome to America where you cant play tag anymore cause you cant touch anyone. Welcome to the land where if you look at someone..and they FEEL you are GLARING at them that you should be arrested. Welcome to everytime some whiny fucking group bitches about something they think is wrong or immorral the govenment says… oh … yeah sure we can take that RIGHT away… than we will charge a fee and have people take a class and prove themselves able to perform that task in a safe manor… like… fishing… What the fuck, you have to have a license …that you pay for… to take a hook… throw it into the water and wait and wait and wait and wait.. so that maybe possibly a fish just might bite the fucking thing. Now in the event that happens in those many hours of waiting…and someone sees you doing it..and thinks.. maybe they dont ahve a license… you can get fined..and have to pay….. i cant go on… too much stuff pisses me off… welcome to the land of the free.

    And for all of you that are gona say.. oh so go live in some third world country ,our countrys great. Fuck you if you cant realize im just pointing out that you are losing your rights and in no way am i saying i dont like the united states. Its the best place to be. Just a few things that are fucked up about it. Im done, you can all go home now
27. 

    Locus Cosecant
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    I just looooooove the level of calm, rational, intelligent discussion a linkage by Penny Arcade brings. You guys are making them look bad in a major way with your idiocy.
28. 

    PA Reader
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Ok, for all that criticized PA for this, screw you. Tycho put it there as a laugh, at the stupidity of some people.

    As to this whole issue, I think anyone who is willing to pay over $10 a month to play game they already paid $50 for, should be lined up and shot. Seriously, it isn’t worth it! I play D2:LoD all the time on B.net. My cost? The $50 for the game, $30 for the expansion and my time. I don’t have continual fees. And I’m not required to pay to enjoy the initial investment in the game. I

    f you want to ‘cyber’ jsut download WinMX (yes the file-sharer) and dont use it to download. It is actually quite enjoyable to screw with people in chat rooms. Plus, it’s free!

    Sims is fun, simply because you can build the hsoue you know you will never have, because the upper 1% is screwing the rest of us. meh. But TSO is a fucking joke and so is Star Wars Galaxies. I’d prefer to play KotOR for a SW game. And if you are willing to pay real cash for fake stuff in-game (and yes, I have seen retards spend over $40 on eBay for the Constricting Ring on eBay in v1.09d D2:LoD) again you should be shot. You pay for something that isn’t real. And ya’ know what? I am gonna take advantage of the fools. When I quit another game I play (Runescape) I will sell all my gold and equipment (but not account, which is in violation of TOS) for over $20 on eBay.

    Actaully, here’s an idea. This entire race has harmed this planet too much and show our stupidity further everyday. Fuck it. Bomb the entire planet and be done with it!
29. 

    Marley
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    I came from Penny Arcader, (www.penny-arcade.com) Ad this article sucked, the others are ok but someone who TYPEs in ebonics either needs to be slapped or start playig C-S… 1337 5934|
30. 

    Mrs.BE
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Actually, around the time TSO came out first, my friend and I made a joke-brothel called “Hooker’s Hideout” or some crap like that. We were playing to the angle of getting some hapless, horny moron to walk in and out of the charge doors a ridiculous amount of time, then either kick them from the premesis, or go “afk”.
    Eventually, my friend let some girls move in, and somehow it transpired into a full on whorehouse. Of course, us two were the only ones getting money, and girls came and went like crazy — but the place was BUSY.
    I eventually got disgusted and sold everything in the house, but at first it was just a hilarious idea to us. Horny boys (or creepy 40 year old men) flock to these cyber hotels like you wouldn’t believe.

    But, they’re paying 10$ a month to cyber with ‘women’, and might sometimes pay additional cash to cyber?
    All I can say are two things: One, they’re the ones who need a brain scan, and two — if they’re kids, where the HELL are they getting the cash to pay for this?

    Bah!

    As a side note, someone mentioned you don’t have girls pimping out girls in RTS, but B.net has a creepy slave system going on, and cyber rooms. And games. You can’t avoid it, some horny little prat’s going to do it eventually. Even a game I used to play called Nexus had “newbie hookers” who would cyber with a player under another name for money for their other character. Most of the time they wouldn’t even be female, but did the buyer know? Of course not!

    Technically, it’s not just fucked up of the girl here to be taking “pimping” out people seriously, but the fact that there’s morons out there who are paying cash for a little bit of pixelated action. Real life hookers might wind up being less expensive at that rate.
31. 

    cliff
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    downfall of society? all u idiots need to realise THIS IS A DAMN GAME WE ARE TALKING ABOUT hahahaha
32. 

    DICK.
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    My my. Lots of judging going on here.

    Political correctness sucks; this articule is just pure funny. Decay of society nothing. I thought it was incredibly amusing to read this.
33. 

    fhqwgads
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    This reminds me of when trading Evercrack items on eBay was a hot topic, and there were debates about it left, right and center. You know what happened? a) people forgot about it completely or b) people decided to cash in on it. Because of the b’ers the market was over-farmed, the items lost value, as everyone was doing it. The same thing will happen here. This kid is just the first to cash in on this particular game in this particular way. Not the first time it’s happened, and most likely not the last.
34. 

    The Messiah
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Who is stupid? I would think that anyone who DIDN’T open a whore house, or murder people, or do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING they are not supposed to do in that game is a loser.. I mean.. what the fuck are you supposed to do in that piece of shit game anyway? Feed to poor? Write a novel? No you are supposed to shit all over it, fuck people in the star, get porn in it somehow.. turn it into the pile of shit it is. Nothing would be more gratifying than to hack the turd out of it.. How else are you going to get your money’s worth? Can you kill people in it? What the fuck do you do in it? Try to have the nicest fake car? Fuck, don’t we all get enough of that in the Real fake world? Seriously? What is the objective in that game if it’s not to open a whore house and degrade people? The whole game itself IS a whore house. Maxis is pimping every whore that pays to play in that shit. And good for them. And don’t think they won’t pimp slap any of these bitches if they start to cut into their profits. Maxis is the real fucking pimp here. Good for that 40 year old 15 year old hermaphrodite pimp getting it’s cash on.

    The thought of two 15 year olds cybering each other, pretending to be 10 and 50, using thier parents money to do so.. that is funny. Just remembering who is getting paid. Maxis.
35. 

    Jet
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Not like anyone will see this…but I really gotta respond to all the people saying how pathetic Evangeline is. What I think about the player him/herself, it really doesn’t matter…honestly I think he/she sounds like an idiot, and annoying/stupid as hell. But I really, really gotta respect something like this…

    He/she is making real money for cyber prostitution…it could be equated to porn or something whichd oes the exact some thing…just not in an MMORPG setting. I think that this could even be a trend for future MMORPG’s…maybe companies, porn sites, whoever else setting up a name for themselves in actual virtual worlds…not just specific game settings…anyway…smart thing to do Evangeline…the rest of you all…stop whining
36. 

    Lunarian
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Well then, Uri, I believe you did what you needed to do by keeping up with such “raw data” as you put it. 1337, already judging by such a name one could possibly assume that you are just an egotistical nerd. However, I won’t jump to such conclusions because it seems that you know what your talking about unlike many people who post like the common “Idiot”. I refer to the idiots who don’t really seem to care for some kind of proper english (Yes folks, “stupider” is not a word. “More stupid” is the correct term. If your looking for an -er term, then the correct term is “dumber”). Uri, I must agree with 1337 to point. Perhaps you should have made some notes, maybe to a side, or maybe at the bottom, to what you were thinking at certain times or explaining specific details to those who haven’t played the game before, or have no idea of what it even is for that matter. And, 1337, Uri did the job. If you wish for it to be cleaned up, perhaps talk with Uri some and you can possibly clean it up. With that said I’m sure it wouldn’t hurt posting the cleaned up version below, to the side, or even linked from the original post. Oh well, who I am to say.

    Oh, and by the way, those who bash on Penny Arcade should really try to think more. Perhaps they were trying to explain what the whole comic was about in the first place. Have you ever heard an inside joke and wanted to laugh with everyone else? Well, perhaps they were trying to let you on the inside so you can laugh to. Consider it.

    If you wish to bash me for anything I have said, also with death threats, letter bombs, cease and desist notes, or the occasional compliment contact me through AOL Istant Messenger: LunarianMagic, Yahoo! Messenger: LunarianGod, or MSN Messenger or E-Mail: Hypermagic@hotmail.com

    Thank you for your time and patience in reading this.
37. 

    Jabbausaf
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Interesting read…

    Why oh why didn’t I take the blue pill?

    Cyber sex is fun, but I usually only done it with people I’ve had IRL sex with (yes, there is such a thing) so that we have something to base our fantasies on. My partner usually has her own toys too, so we also have physical sensation on both sides. I work with what I can, as most of my sexual partners are currently on the other side of the world from me.

    “NE1 WAN 2 CYBER?????////” is still out of the question.
38. 

    EvilJamie
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    AAAHHH! Why did I read that?
    GIVE ME BACK MY BRAIN CELLS!
39. 

    Eric
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    …This chick degrades Neon Genesis Evangelion. -_-
40. 

    PogiChoie
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    This reminds me of two quotes from Clerks: The Animated Series, that I just have to repeat here. If I get it wrong, remember, I’m quoting from memory here and I’m too lazy to pop in the DVD and copy it word for word.

    Randall: Yiikes… are they cognizant of how bad they’ve got it?

    Pinheads: One of us! One of us! HEHEHEHEHEHEHE!
41. 

    crust
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    can you kill people in SOL i want to kill people in SOL for money, that’s what i’ll do. or just steal their last pair of clean underwear..how you like them apples…..btw since when did reality or “real life” (yes it does exist) become another stupid lol or rofl or lmao geez RL?
42. 

    BossHossV8Cycles
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    I know a whole lot of people have already said what I’m about to say, but I had to comment on this. First of all, if this is a legitimate conversation, this Van person seriously needs a life. It’s pitiful when a person starts to mix fantasy with reality. The Sims Online is just a game, nothing more. The reason why this Van person is so involved in this game is probably because she/he wants so bad to be the person that she/he has made up. I say if a person wants to make a so-called “cyber whore house” on a video game, let them. They’re just degrading themselves, and showing how much of an idiot they are. And if people do really go to this “whore house” to get some, for lack of better terms, “lovin’” then let them. That, in and of itself, shows more insult than anything that anyone can say to them.

    A note on the act of cybering: You’ve got to be very desperate for a person of the opposite sex (or same sex if you’re a homo) to even want to “cyber.” I stop to wonder if a person that is willing to cyber would also be willing to call phone sex companies… how pathetic. Cybersex isn’t real sex, nor will it ever be. So to those who “cyber,” go out and get a real girlfriend/boyfriend. Though, I doubt that would ever happen, seeing that simply going outside would be quite a large step for you.

    Back to the Van conversation, I started off this reply with “…if this is a legitimate conversation..” of which I think this is not. This was quite entertaining for a hoax.
43. 

    TribalBob
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    I came from Penny-Arcade as well (who did a great job of making fun of this imo) and I just have to say that this is the sort of thing I expected from people who play 10 dollars a month in order to do what they could do in real life… but online.
44. 

    BossHossV8Cycles
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    TribalBob, heh heh, good point. It’s funny to see how many of these replies are from readers of Penny Arcade. PA rules!
45. 

    NoahNever
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    I pity da foo’ who read dis shit. Lobster, eggwhisk. Oh yeah, Chris Moyles rocks!!
46. 

    Jabbausaf
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Boss: I do have an IRL girlfriend. But she lives in Massachusetts. I’m stationed in South Korea. Internet sex with her is no match for sex with her, but it’s *something*. If you’re a bookworm and can get off on written porn (or erotica), then cyber with an intelligent partner isn’t too bad. It’s basically just forming a framework for the whacking-off fantasies you’d be having anyway.

    Now, were I stateside, then yeah, cybering would be inexcusable. But here, either you vie for the affections of one of the military girls on base (and there’s an 8:1 guy:girl ratio, and I despise petty competition like that), or you pay to illegally use the services of a disease-ridden woman of ill-repute down in the tourist sections, or you get your ass kicked by locals for hitting on a Korean woman.

    >_
47. 

    RuffianHunter
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    Top left picture:
    http://www.geocities.com/welovenewbiestso/feedback.html

    2nd Down on the right:
    http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com/

    Gee, that Shuanna gets around…
48. 

    maxe
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    I like penny-arcade.
49. 

    Myrddraal
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    I believe I speak for everyone here when I quote Something Awful:

    THE INTERNET MAKES YOU STUPID.

    Thank you for your time..
50. 

    Anomel
    

    Dec 16th, 2003
    

    wait…why DID I read this?

    …curse you Penny Arcade :p

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