Herald Correspondent Attacked by Bill Cosby, Investigation Launched

by Alphaville Herald on 18/02/07 at 6:20 pm

by Jimbo Quality

Cosby2

[Editor's Note: Jimbo's investigation into the perpetrators of the attack described below is continuing. As is the Herald's into how this guy get to write for our paper in the first place.
--Walker Spaight
]

If you’re like me, you often find yourself camping a camping chair at a place like the LV Casino »in Baeogae«. It was almost 9:00pm SL time on a recent Saturday evening when I was doing just that, standing next to a camper’s chair, hoping to beat her back into it when the last of her active cycles ran out and the chair kicked her out like an extra ball in an old pinball machine. After all, good camp chairs are hard to find.

I’d been a little nervous that I wasn’t going to get a chair at all. But then, across the smoky casino floor I spotted her. She’d been there a while, her idle cycles were almost used up and she was nodding off into the AFK mode. I stood next to the chair, waiting, watching for the telltale signs that she was about to go down.

All of a sudden I was accosted by a zillion Bill Cosbys.

Before I know it, I was standing outside the casino being hit on the head by ol’ Cliff Huxtable himself — and then things started to get strange. There were explosions, disturbing images of someone’s distended posterior, and, most disturbing of all, a reporter from a rival newspaper and an angry little avatar with a protest sign right in the middle of it all.

Middle

All the while, the Coz kept right on a coming.

Now, I think Bill Cosby is a genius. He gave us Fat Albert, and he may also have invented the Prince Albert in a Can prank telephone call. [Or maybe not -- Ed.] His 1980s television show character, Clff Huxtable, single handedly gave all the ugly sweaters in my closet hope that they too would one day be seen as “fun” and not just “ugly.” His remarkable vocal harmonies with his band, Cosby, Stills, Nash and Young, produced a timeless body of music [My kingdom for a fact-checker -- Ed.], and I believe that his most famous song, the civil rights anthem “White Christmas,” is still the biggest selling single ever. [Ummm . . . -- Ed.] I was very upset to think that he was attacking me as I tried to earn a few Lindens, so as I watched my screen fill with images of my hero, I fought back tears and wondered, “Why would Bill do this to me?”

My next thought was, “I wonder if that chick is still in the camping chair.” Throwing caution to the wind, I trundled toward the casino and found myself unable to get back in! The images and explosions were thick now, and the entrance to the casino was so jammed with Cosbys and explosions that I couldn’t get near the door. “Damn my luck!” I thought. I could feel the Lindens slipping through my fingers.

As I stood there, the explosions increased, and images continued to flood my screen for several minutes. The other reporter and the angry little man were very close to what appeared to be the center of the thing, so I retreated to safety to watch. I mean, if one of them is actually blown up into little avatar chunks then someone has to stay alive to tell the story, right?

Safe

Once I established that nothing new or exciting was going to happen, and once I realized I was too chicken to try and get back into the casino with explosions in my way, I went home. Ten minutes later, I went back to the LV Casino to investigate, and found that the attack was over and, miraculously, the camping chairs were all empty! I hopped up in one and got busy detecting.

Camping_1

Now, Dear Readers, it may come as a surprise to you, but I believe I am one of the great detective minds of this century. Every day I expect the phone to ring and I’ll hear the voice of Gil Grissom, or one of the supernerds on the Criminal Minds show, and they’ll be begging me to join their team. (Truth be told, I really want Freddie to call and ask me to join Scooby and Shaggy and the rest of the gang. Mmmmm, Velmam you are so hot, if you read this, call me baby, please!)

Anyhow, as I sat in the chair I launched my investigation, assembling a few incisive theories as to who might have launched this attack and why. The unusual suspects:

Bill Cosby — The most obvious candidate. For that reason, I eliminate him.

The Angry Little Man — A lot of lesser minds would overlook this guy, but not me. He would my top suspect in this case, except for three things. Number one, all the standard police procedures say that the spouse is always top suspect and not only am I not married to him, I’ve never even heard of him. Number two, he was holding a protest sign, and anyone flinging that many Cosby pictures would need two hands. Number three, on Law and Order it’s always the guest star that commits the crime, and again, I’ve never heard of this guy. Clearly innocent.

The Rival News Correspondent — She was conveniently right there at the center of it all, and everyone knows you can’t trust a reporter. If I didn’t have better suspects all lined up, I’d blame her. She also works for the yucky other paper.

The Chick in the Camping Chair — It’s possible she was only pretending to be “away” and knew I was going to pounce into her chair with catlike reflexes, so she bombed the place with Cosbys to distract us all.

The Yogurt Industry — Here’s my #2 suspect. Bill Cosby sold millions of packages of Jell-O brand pudding, and everyone knows that that market share comes at the expense of all the other members of that same “eaten with a spoon from a plastic container” food group. It is my belief that yogurt industry executives could have banded together and started a program to defame Mr. Cosby here in SL.

Someone Altogether Different — My leading suspect, at this point. I think it’s quite possible that someone besides the other people on my list could have been responsible for this. I base this on the fact that that’s always how it happens when I watch TV crime shows. I always think it’s suspect A, B, D, E, or F and it’s always C.

Of course, all this is only speculation at this point. I’m not actually accusing anyone of anything, and I think the above-named individuals are, at this point, great people with lots of civic pride and other good things going for them. They should not feel angry or harmed or anything, because I love them and would take them all out for a nice lunch if avatars could eat. We’d even have yogurt and Jell-O, showing that the two can peacefully coexist. Please don’t sue me.

And remember, Dear Readers, always bring a towel — and if you know of any good camping chairs, give me a holler.

88 Responses to “Herald Correspondent Attacked by Bill Cosby, Investigation Launched”

  1. Prokofy Neva

    Feb 18th, 2007

    Duh. This is really not the rocket science you are faking here.

    And who is Jimbo Quality, anyway?

    This attack was obviously done by the griefer group that is an offshoot of one of the Something Awful sects, they’re called “Patriotic Nigras”. They are famous for using that ‘Pool’s Closed’ sign. They always make a fetish of using black figures or personalities in their attacks, which appears to be a racist act. A lot is known about them and their attacks and their writings in SL, and they’re banned everywhere for really awful attacks, like W-hat does.
    http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php/Patriotic_Nigras

  2. Alex Fitzsimmons

    Feb 19th, 2007

    You’re partly right. It would probably be more accurate to say that the “Patriotic Nigras” are part of 4chan specifically, which is … which is something I’m sure you can look up, if you don’t already know.

    But yes. “Pool’s closed” gives it away.

  3. Jimbo Quality

    Feb 19th, 2007

    wow! you guys read this! cool! thanks!

  4. Alex Fitzsimmons

    Feb 19th, 2007

    Not only did we read it, but we did your work as a journalist for you. Pity one of the most important pieces of information (the “who” element) will never find its way anywhere near the beginning of the story.

    Here’s hoping interested people read the comments …

  5. Mako Mabellon

    Feb 19th, 2007

    You’re partly right. It would probably be more accurate to say that the “Patriotic Nigras” are part of 4chan specifically, which is … which is something I’m sure you can look up, if you don’t already know.

    How diplomatic. While 4chan was originally founded by people from Something Awful, the two aren’t really related these days. I doubt most of the people on 4chan have Something Awful accounts, and they have seperate cultures, memes, etc – including, in the case of 4chan, a dedicated group of forum/virtual world invaders.

    The original founder of 4chan has been trying to clamp down on this sort of thing for some time (with the effect of driving the organisation of the attacks elsewhere – usually 7chan). Unfortunately, they’re good at what they do…

  6. Pierre

    Feb 19th, 2007

    The ‘rival news correspondent’ from the ‘other yucky paper’.

    Not a newspaper, but a German blog about SL – http://www.sl-news.net.

    Good reporting!

  7. Lewis nerd

    Feb 19th, 2007

    The only “good camping chair” is a non-working one.

    A pox upon the grid, they be.

    Lewis

  8. Aetler

    Feb 19th, 2007

    So I’m reading the comments and I see: “Duh. This is really not the rocket science you are faking here. And who is Jimbo Quality, anyway? This attack was obviously done by the griefer group that…”

    And I’m thinking: who is the total complete freak that’s reading this as anything but a funny article?

    Oh, it’s Prok.

  9. Jimbo Quality

    Feb 19th, 2007

    SL Herald readers are the bestest readers in all the land.

    thank you all for your wonderful comments. You’ll note that I did in fact ID the perpetrator, my top suspect was “someone else altogether” which covers this group, Wu Tan, you speak of.

    Thank You!
    Jimbo

  10. Alex Fitzsimmons

    Feb 19th, 2007

    “And I’m thinking: who is the total complete freak that’s reading this as anything but a funny article?

    Oh, it’s Prok.”

    Humor is great, and yes, I know the Herald is basically a half-silly publication, but if I’m looking for laughs, I don’t really go to the Herald for them. I mean, humor’s easy to find, and there’s a lot of stuff on the Internet that’s infinitely funnier than this article. ;)

    Injecting humor here and there is great, but since a lot of people who read the Herald are at least partly looking for real information, or the beginnings of real information, I dunno … a little journalism probably wouldn’t kill anyone.

    Just sayin’. ;)

  11. jimbo quality

    Feb 19th, 2007

    Alex Fitzsimmons said “I mean, humor’s easy to find, and there’s a lot of stuff on the Internet that’s infinitely funnier than this article”

    You’re absolutely right, i find nothing funny about this article and I am aghast that people would find it humorous. I was attacked by bill cosby and a distended bunghole and I probably missed at least ten minutes of camping.

    Thank you, Alex, for being an understanding voice in the wilderness. It’s about time someone validated my pain and anguish.

    Sincerely,
    Jimbo

  12. Alex Fitzsimmons

    Feb 19th, 2007

    I couldn’t care less about your “plight,” any more than I care about your awkward attempts at humor, and I think you know that.

    What I *am* curious about is whether we’re going to see more incidents like this. I know they hit Habbo Hotel in a similar fashion.

  13. Richy Bitch

    Feb 19th, 2007

    Alex:

    As long as furfags exist, yes.

  14. jimbo quality

    Feb 19th, 2007

    Not to pick nits, but i didn’t actually use the word “plight” in my post, so i don’t think you’re allowed to put it in quotes. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.

    Thanks for Reading,
    Jimbo

  15. Mudkips Acronym

    Feb 19th, 2007

    Hello, fine upstanding citizens of Second Life and what have you. “If you’re not a furry, you have nothing to worry,” as we say in our organization. We are no SA group, nor W-HAT. W-HAT are a bunch of cowards who stay barely within the rules. No, we simply enjoy harassing furfags – for the lulz, of course. All I can say is that the GYC, FurNation, all of them are going to be closed for a while. As for Bill Cosby’s role in the attack, his Jello Pudding Pops are suspected to be lethal.

    Entertaining article, and enjoy your Pokeyman pudding pops. Heh heh heh.

  16. like_ummm

    Feb 19th, 2007

    This was a real funny article – i really liked it – but come on! SL Herald is a non-humour zone – thems are the rules. Post your humour in some other places like google or yahoo! – they’re pretty funny. SL Herald would win a pulitzer-prize for journalism if it weren’t for posts such as yours!

  17. Alex Fitzsimmons

    Feb 19th, 2007

    “Not to pick nits, but i didn’t actually use the word “plight” in my post, so i don’t think you’re allowed to put it in quotes.”

    What a perfectly silly thing to say.

    Anyway, I’m of the opinion — however unpopular it may be — that there’s a time and a place for humor, and this isn’t it. Griefer groups and their antics are not, and never have been, funny to me, probably because I can and do stop and think about how I’d feel if I were the victim rather than an outside observer, or worse, one of the perpetrators.

    I’m sure some of you are going to say “but it’s just a game” or “it’s not like anyone really gets hurt,” but those kinds of responses are really utter crap. The people saying them are probably the same ones who’d throw a fit if they merely got inconvenienced by a long line in a retail store. They’re probably the same ones who rant and rave about how awful Linden Labs is every time Second Life goes down — and yes, I’ve done some of that criticism myself, but isn’t it funny how it’s a big joke and just tons of LOLs if it’s some griefer group’s latest gag?

    I can absolutely guarantee that a lot of these people who think it’s just a big joke wouldn’t be laughing if they were the ones being singled out as targets.

    I don’t think griefers or griefer attacks are funny or good subjects to joke about. I never have. I imagine I never will.

    Sorry.

  18. bix nood

    Feb 19th, 2007

    OWNED

  19. omgwtf bbqlol

    Feb 19th, 2007

    Attribute this to whatever you like, readers, you will only be partially right.

    Raiders have no identity, they are, by all means, unknowable. They go by the title of Anonymous, they will not stop until Second Life is clean of what they view as a cancer.

    This is not the first Cosby particle box, nor will it likely be the last. Their weapons are ever changing, and they are nigh-unstoppable.

  20. Alex Fitzsimmons

    Feb 19th, 2007

    BS. It’s 4chan. You can’t use a signature trick like that and call yourself unknowable. ;p

  21. Anonymous

    Feb 20th, 2007

    We are Anonymous, and we do not forgive.

    We are void of human restraints, such as pity and mercy.

    All those who break this pact will be eliminated without hesitation.

    Those who perform reckless actions or wish to harm the Anonymous will be eliminated without hesitation.

    Failure is not tolerated.

    Enemies of the Anonymous include anyone who is not an Anonymous.

    Our enemies are to be eliminated swiftly and without incident.

    Anonymous must work as one. No Anonymous knows everything.

    Betrayal of Anonymous is both impossible and unaccepted.

    Manipulation of the weak and innocent is an Anonymous specialty. Once a victim is no longer commodious, they are to be eliminated.

    REPRODUCE. REPRODUCE. REPRODUCE.

    No man-made or natural occurance can harm the Anonymous.

    Under no circumstances are Anonymous human. We are above humans and mortality.

    Anonymous are not to partake in meaningless tasks. Those who do are to be either reformed or eliminated.

    You are legion, for we are many.

    Anonymous is everywhere at all times. Yet, singular Anonymous are not permitted to know everything.

    All have the potential to be Anonymous until they choose not to. Those who are not Anonymous are to be eliminated.

    Anonymous has no weakness or flaw.

    Laws of Nature and Man cannot restrain the Anonymous.

    Anonymous is one. Feuding and argument amongst the Anonymous is both impossible and unaccepted.

    Anonymous is in control at all times.

    Anonymous has no identity. Those who are not Anonymous yet know our presence must be eliminated.

    Anonymous cannot be contained by mere restraints.

    Anonymous are all equal. No one is more or less important then Anonymous.

    Anonymous must obey the Code. Those who do not are to be reformed or eliminated.

    Anonymous worships nothing.

    Anonymous cares for nothing but Anonymous.

    Humanity is the virus; Anonymous is the cure.

    We are Anonymous, and we do not forgive.

  22. Cocoanut Koala

    Feb 20th, 2007

    Idiot.

    coco

  23. Anonymous

    Feb 20th, 2007

    Hahahahaha.

    Man, you should give up journalism, and trash your computer. Your writing style sucks, your “detective” skills would make a rock the best detective ever, and you try and gain money by “campng chairs” in an online game infested by furries and idiots like you.

    “DUHR THAR IS A NIGRA IN HERE, AND HE HAS A POOLSCLOSED SIGN AND A CLEARLY VISIBLE COCK. BUT HE ISN’T SUSPICIOUS ENOUGH. OMG REPORTER, IT MUST BE HER. OR MAYBE THE SLUT WHO’S FALLING ASLEEP IN HER CHAIR. BUT LETS IGNORE THE NIGRA AND WRITE A SHITTY ARTICLE OOZING WITH UNFUNNYNESS EDITED BY AN EDITOR WHO LOVES BRACKETS AND WILL NOT SHUT UP.”

    Jesus Christ. Go kill yourself.

  24. LaBlanc

    Feb 20th, 2007

    “W-HAT are a bunch of cowards who stay barely within the rules—”

    Then stop using things created by W-Hat to do your stupid, unfunny “particle spam” attacks. You’re the most uncreative, vapid fucks I’ve ever encountered. Unsuitable for even GBS consumption.

  25. LaBlanc

    Feb 20th, 2007

    “We are Anonymous, and we do not forgive”

    You are shitty gimmick, do not leave /r/ (etards)

  26. Hal Turner

    Feb 20th, 2007

    Wut?

  27. eric

    Feb 20th, 2007

    Personally this is one instance when i cheer the griefer. You people shouldnt be on fricking camp chairs anyway CAMP CHAIRS ARE FOR LOSERS All camp chairs do is screw with the popular places and with all the abuse in the search listings as it is we dont need losers in camp chairs and worse then that a media sorce condoneing them Get a life and get a second life while you are at it

  28. IntLibber Brautigan

    Feb 20th, 2007

    To correct Mudkips Ackronym: Mud, your a liar, a bigot, anti-semite, homophobe, racist, and a terrorist.

    a) a liar: despite your claims, your group has attacked my estate for a month on a nearly daily basis. there are zero furry sims in my estate. I suppose having some furry employees and a few furry residents is enough for you to try to wreck things for everybody, but that just shows the extent of your hate and vileness.
    b) a bigot: while most of you are white teenage boys with too little parental supervision and no prospects with the ladies, you prance around wearing outfits promoting grossly stereotypical african american features like huge afro-hair, dark black skin, etc.
    c) anti-semite: you display at your Fort Longcats, images promoting Adolph Hitler, the swastika, and are logged making anti-semitic statements on a number of occasions
    d) homophobe: pretty self explanatory, you attack furries because many are gay (though no exclusively so, but that doesn’t stop you from targeting all with your hateful assaults).
    e) racist: see (b), plus the fact you accuse people who oppose your hate and intolerance as “racist” is apparently intended to abuse the word to meaninglessness.
    f) terrorist: crashing sims for hours, to the point of requiring grid monkey to physically reset the server, is a Weapon of Mass Destruction. Obvious terrorism, seeking to instill fear in the SL population.

    Patriotic Nigras is merely the top level group. It uses other groups like /b/, /b/tards, /b/SUPREMACY, /i/lluminati, FBI, Freemasons, United by One Divided by Zero, to recruit and filter similarly bigoted twits (and to weed out infiltrators intent on exposing them). It has a cellular structure, like any terrorist organization, to compartmentalize information and avoid exposure.

    They are also thieves, squatting their fortresses on other peoples land, and wrecking the sim time of others. The PN tried also to defraud the World Stock Exchange and its bank, as a scheme to poison many persons accounts with frauded L$, which would have caused those persons accounts to be cancelled (like Nexxus Ambassadors was) by LL due to its Risk API. The PN is not just a risk to the furries of SL, but to all residents of SL. All residents need to stand up against the griefer threat and tell Linden Labs that enough is enough, griefing must end.

    It is simple enough to achieve this. There are a few things LL can do:
    a) allow avs to have more than 25 group memberships, perhaps 64 or 256 memberships, this will eliminate the only reason for honest avs to need alts.
    b) limit alts per IP/MAC/HDD serial number to 3-5.
    c) only allow one basic account per IP/MAC/HDD, and actually mean it. it is too easy to bypass this in the current client.
    d) remove parcel level bans from client-side enforcement. this poor security decision by LL has allowed PN to develop their ShoopedLife client, that is not bannable by parcel level bans, from the Open Source client.
    e) Make the crime of sim crashing a permanent bannable offense for the IP/MAC/HDD or processor serial number, and enforce it, even if its a child of a Linden…;).
    f) Create a subset of lsl for estate managers to be able to script estate security features to better automate responses to griefing attacks.
    g) allow estate managers to ban people by group association, to drop a list of names into the estate banlist, and to expand the estate banlist beyond its present 300 name limit, to around 1000 names.

    What residents can do to protect themselves:
    a) do not allow others to build on your land, beyond whatever group you associate it with or deed it to.
    b) ensure that you live where the estate has an active estate manager presence to respond to attacks.
    c) estate managers can neutralize the PN’s dreaded Doomsday Gun by turning off collisions when an attack starts, or when warned ahead of time of a coming attack by a trusted source.
    d) residents can turn off particles in the edit>preferences dialog to neutralize particle effects upon their client.
    e) when an attack does occur, as many residents as possible should file abuse reports on every perpetrator.
    f) above all, do not tolerate intolerance and hate. The Big 6 are the bedrock of the SL community, but are meaningless if we don’t all take personal responsibility for making our community a better place.

  29. lol

    Feb 20th, 2007

    lol @ intlib.

    That won’t stop us, and you’re obviously too dumb to figure out how the hacked client works.

    But thanks for the idea of dodging parcel bans, I’ll add that in in the next version!

  30. Mudkips Acronym

    Feb 20th, 2007

    lol intlib. YHBT, YHL, HAND.

    also, we haven’t tried to defraud the world stock exchange, though that would be kind of fun.

    you’re only pissed because a couple people shot penises on your land, and now you’re writing essays. you are the very definition of a lulzcow.

  31. Hay sup guyz

    Feb 20th, 2007

    Hey Intlb,

    IMMA ON UR PROPERTY, FIRIN’ MAH PEN0R.

  32. >:3

    Feb 20th, 2007

    A rebuttal to Intlib.

    Let’s go over this point by point shall we?

    a) You don’t have to have furries to be a target, all you have to be is so full of yourself that you freak out over an attack. Freak out once and they’ll come back because the more you struggle and complain, the funnier it is.

    b) So being black with an afro is a sterotype? I thought it was just stylish. Besides, nothing negative is said about their avatars, in fact, they’re held up to a high standard and respected. If wanting to be black and have a big fro is being a bigot, then those that dress up as foxes and the like in SL are actually anti-furry. Nice logic there.

    c) Adolf and nazi images are for shock value. You see them and you freak out, thus causing humor for anonymous. On top of that, they are also often used as a kind of protest against certain practices that take place. If you end up seeing nazi images on your land again, it’s most likely their way of calling YOU a nazi.

    d) There are gay people in the anonymous groups, don’t kid yourself. Furries are targets because they freak out the most when confronted with this kind of stuff. They’ve screamed “fursecution” and have likened themselves to the jews during the holocaust (another reason for the nazi imagery). Anyone that takes themselves THAT seriously, and makes claims THAT insane, makes themselves a prime target for anons. Again, the more you freak out and thrash, the funnier it is.

    e) Redundant much? Also, there are plenty of people in the real world making the word meaningless through ridiculous claims already, that’s nothing new. On top of all that, anons have been insulted with racial slurs in the past for showing up as a black man. So there really ARE some racists out there.

    f)Weapon of Mass destruction??? Server crash =/= nuke. Servers can be reset, the damage can be fixed.

    Also, I’ve heard nothing about Anons going after the WSE, that’s just conspiracy talk.

    Final Word:
    If you really want to be left alone and not griefed, pull your head out of your own behind, take yourself off that high platform and just relax.
    Have fun for once in your life.
    If you don’t react to it, or just go along with it, then you’re not ‘lulzy’ enough to be a target.
    Besides, every single option you gave to stop them just flat out WON’T WORK. It’s like punching the wind.

    Stop taking yourself so seriously.

    (10 bux says I get an essay back trying to prove me wrong, lol @ lulzcow)

  33. Mudkips Acronym

    Feb 20th, 2007

    also i just noticed you spelled my name wrong. that makes me cry. ;(

  34. IntLibber Brautigan

    Feb 20th, 2007

    No essay, just one more proof of your lies: I was there, when Rhubarb Triskaidekaphobia and ORLY Lawl tried to fraud the exchange. My intel told me what they were doing.

    This sort of fraud is not new. Another member of PN used an alt to donate frauded L$ to furnation, causing Nexxus Ambassadors full assets (10 million L$) to be seized by LL’s Risk API. Thats neither funny nor fun. Other PN go into clubs and throw hundreds of thousands of fraud L$ into sploder balls just to cause the winners accounts to be cancelled. Again: neither funny, nor fun. Plain evil.

    Finally, Enron Dagger’s digging into my real life ID, targeting my family IRL, etc. is neither funny nor fun. No lulz for you. For this reason, the real FBI Cybercrime unit has been given all your IP addresses for further investigation…. lulz… “knock knock… who’s there?…. PWNED”

  35. IntLibber Brautigan

    Feb 20th, 2007

    Oh and BTW: I have the hacked client… which is why I know that it evades parcel level bans.

  36. >:3

    Feb 20th, 2007

    Because IPs can’t be spoofed, amirite Intlib?
    Lawl.

  37. Mudkips Acronym

    Feb 20th, 2007

    Sorry, IntLib, but looking up someone’s Whois registration isn’t illegal.

  38. N3X15

    Feb 20th, 2007

    HEY INTLIB

    THE CLIENT DOESN’T EVADE PARCEL BANS YET YOU STUPID COCKSUCKING DRAMAQUEEN WITH BEES IN YOUR CUNT

    YOU JUST HAVEN’T GOTTEN BANNED YET

    PANSY

    ALSO COCKS

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

  39. Jimbo Quality

    Feb 20th, 2007

    SL Herald readers are the bestest readers in all the land.

    thank you all for your wonderful comments. You’ll note that I did in fact ID the perpetrator, my top suspect was “someone else altogether” which covers this group, Wu Tan, you speak of.

    Thank You!
    Jimbo

  40. Jimbo Quality

    Feb 21st, 2007

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  41. Anonymous

    Feb 21st, 2007

    Who the hell is Wu Tan?

  42. Anon-Maus

    Feb 21st, 2007

    IntLib, when did this supposed “frauded L$” thing happen? I’ve been with the PNs since their 3rd fort, I’ve known ORLY and Rhubarb, and I’ve never heard anything of this. Honestly.

    PNs going to clubs and throwing hundreds of thousands of frauded L$ into “sploder balls”?

    I very much doubt that ever happened. Knowing them, they would be wasting money on uploading textures and sounds; or even buying land. I know that some Anons are quite smart, but I don’t believe any have been able to create Linden bux out of thin air. That sounds like a load of BS.

    Are you sure your “intel” is telling you the truth and not pulling stuff out their arses?

  43. IntLibber Brautigan

    Feb 21st, 2007

    HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I SUCK COCKS

  44. IntLibber Brautigan

    Feb 21st, 2007

    To correct Myself: I’m a liar, a bigot, anti-semite, homophobe, racist, and a terrorist.

    a) a liar: despite my claims, I’ve bitched about my estate for a month on a nearly daily basis. there are OVER NINE THOUSAND furry sims in my estate. I suppose having some furry employees and a few furry residents is enough for you to try to wreck things for everybody, but that just shows the extent of my FAGGERY DAGGERY DOO.
    b) a bigot: while most of you are proud men of african descent, I hate you for wearing outfits promoting african american features like huge afro-hair, dark black skin, etc.
    c) anti-semite: you display at your Fort Longcats, images promoting Adolph Hitler, the swastika, and are logged making anti-semitic statements on a number of occasions, THAT’S MY SHTICK.
    d) homophobe: pretty self explanatory, I’m afriad of anything like me.
    e) racist: see (b), plus the fact I accuse people who oppose my hate and intolerance as “racist” is apparently intended to abuse the word to meaninglessness.
    f) terrorist: whining about sims for hours, to the point of requiring grid monkey to beat me with the server, is a Weapon of Mass Annoyance. Obvious terrorism, seeking to instill pity in the SL population.

    I was there, when Rhubarb Triskaidekaphobia and ORLY Lawl tried to fraud the exchange. My intel lied to me about what they were doing.

    This sort of frawd is all in my head. I used an alt to donate frawded L$ to furnation, causing Nexxus Ambassadors full assets (10 million L$) to be seized by LL’s Risk API. Thats both funny and fun. I also imagined that ther PN go into clubs and throw hundreds of thousands of frawd L$ into sploder bawlls just to cause the winners accounts to be cancelled. Again: impossible, but I think it happened because I’m an idiot.

    Finally, Enron Dagger’s digging into my real life ID, targeting my family IRL, etc. is both funny and fun. Epic lulz for you. For this reason, the real FBI Cybercrime unit has been given all your IP addresses for further investigation, but they’ll ignore it because everything was done legally, so I’ll probably be vanned for falsely reporting a crime…. lulz… “knock knock… who’s there?…. PWNED”

  45. Murderfiend Juutilainen

    Feb 23rd, 2007

    In related business: Shoop da whoop.

  46. Plastic Puck

    Feb 24th, 2007

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  47. A Nony Mous

    Feb 24th, 2007

    lulz

    Second Life is one of those places we go for the lulz. ;]

  48. The One Napalm Vernon

    Feb 25th, 2007

    I witnessed the same attack yesterday in one of the sandboxes. I forget the name, and i wasn’t there long enough to enjoy the ride. This attack didn’t have that Good ol’ BOOM EXPLOSION! Taste to it though. Instead my senses were soaked in the sour aftertaste of Lag.
    However, when i saw the bouncing Cosbys, I had to laugh. I thought it was quite creative..”Jell-OWNED!”. My only concern now is, if the Cosby Lawyer Team will have a say in this (thats a House of Cosbys/Channel101 Reference).

    Anyway, I didn’t care. These attacks happen all the time in the boxes. Hell I’m guilty for throwing stuff back at griefers, when I know I shouldn’t. At least that’s what I am told I shouldn’t do. But it’s fun. I enjoy Chaos like that. It’s certainly more interesting than the normal “build, buy clothes, dance, chat” routine of SL.

  49. Anonymous

    Feb 26th, 2007

    Whoever posted Churuya is my new hero nyoro~n

  50. Proteus Hand

    Feb 27th, 2007

    After all the recent 4chan, 7chan, YTMND and SomethingAwful attacks on sites like Habbo Hotel, Ebaumsworld, and most recently, the Hal Turner show, you honestly have completely disproven your statement of being a master detective…. or even a candidate for a novice detective…… All you really have to do to see this coming is watch the /i/ board on 7chan… and then wait….

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