Near-Disaster Delays Doily Quest – Latex Maid Suit To Blame
by Alphaville Herald on 14/04/09 at 7:24 am
Isolation hoods stand in way of Second Life civilization
by Miss Petunia Amaryllis Courtney Taliaferro, Second Life League of Decency
Why what could be MORE innocent than a doily? At one time, these small lacy tokens of ladies’ handiwork graced the homes of the lowly and their betters. The doily was the harbinger of civilization since who ever saw Genghis Khan use a doily? Thus order was preserved.
But I do veer from my purpose in giving you this brief—but crucial—history of Western Civilization. I thought that the howling wasteland of coarseness known as Second Life might, just might, preserve a bit of refinement. So I went looking.
What, however, did I find when I typed the word “doily” into the search engine of that nefarious pit of sin known as Second Life?
Oh I am still faint from this terrible encounter:
Miss Petunia: Young lady, isn’t this the doily shop?
Latex Dolly Model: uhnnn uhnnnn
Miss Petunia: What IS that on your head, child? Let me help with that zipper
Shop Owner: Get the hell out of here!
Miss Petunia: Why you cad! How dare you…[I was peremptorily banned]
Well, I hope I did not misspell “doily.” Oh, those cursed san-serif fonts!
Now I am well aware that individuals jealous of my queenly appearanceand good breeding might infer that I had tippled a bit too much at thewine-and-crackers social held by the SL League of Decency, to celebratethe opening of Pervert Island, where all the impurities of the mainlandshall soon we whisked away.
Though I must admit that the young ladies at this “doily store” were covered up. That is an improvement of a sort.
Still, take heart, moral residents of this tainted virtual world! I see a gleam of hope at the Xstreetsl.com emporium accessible through my Interweb Net machine. There the term “doily” yielded no fewer than 27 results that were most definitely lacework and not the handiwork of latex-fiends and Sybarites.
Now, gentle readers (for I do not deign to write to the ungentle, and if you are still reading you must be of superior intellect) after all perversions have been removed to Pervert Island, Linden Lab’s contents at Xstreetsl (a coarse name; I blanch at the letter X) offers us the picture of the better future we shall enjoy in Second Life: finely made doilies. I did, at last, manage to acquire some of these, though I admit it came at great peril.
I invite all of you of refined tastes and upright moral stature to join me in this better future…or else.
proper doilies
LOL
Apr 14th, 2009
Miss Petunia Amaryllis, a Lady of your stature must have a maid? what sort is it, a french maid, maybe an english maid. I bet behind closed doors you have a Sissy maid clad in latex serve you tea and biscotti.
Alyx Stoklitsky
Apr 14th, 2009
Why don’t you just call yourself Hyacinth Bucket and be done with it?
This would have been lulzier if you’d just posted a ton of chatlogs of yourself arguing about morality with perverts.
Corona Anatine
Apr 14th, 2009
so there are avatars in SL that indulge in leather fetish BDSM
while others have no idea about it
in what way is this news ?
Eva Ryan
Apr 14th, 2009
/me shoves a dainty doily up Miss Petunia Amaryllis Courtney Taliaferro’s ass.
Lol
Apr 14th, 2009
I say that people who have something against “Mature content” should put up or shut up.
this is supposed to be a free country
Miss Petunia Amaryllis Courtney Taliaferro
Apr 14th, 2009
Well, Miss Stoklitsky, I certainly will take that idea into consideration, as there exists no shortage of reprobates in need of some come-uppance. But MUST I post their emissions and ejaculations unedited at this fine publication?
Perhaps I shall…all the better to identify them for purging and banishment.
And to LOL, I do indeed have several servants. They know their places…but latex is SO gauche and nouveau-riche, don’t you think? The sort of thing that Dorothy Parker, that libertine, might have put on HER maids in that pit of vice, New York City.
I prefer the classic French-Maid look for my domestic help.
Stephie
Apr 15th, 2009
I much agree with Alyx on this one. Watching you argue morality and decency with the cesspit of SecondLife would be rather amusing.