The Re-Invention of Philip Linden
by prokofy on 03/09/07 at 10:49 pm
By Prokofy Neva, Kremlindenologist
[update: photo credit for the picture below - Tara5 Oh. The original picture and Tara5's interview with King Philip can be found here: here]
Mrs. Linden’s little boy is growing up. The fair-haired, Donnie-Osmond-cute repository of our hopes and dreams, “El Chefe” who says we can “blame it all on him,” is now honed into a competent media sound-byter and Customer Experience Specialist more caring than the finest call center has to offer. Back at Virtual Worlds 07, Philip blundered on stage with his architecturally-correct shock of hair, saying that gosh, he engineered this platform, and wow, all these people came on it and he didn’t know what to do with them — before rushing off to hobnob with Bill Clinton on Renaissance Island. We weren’t impressed.
By contrast, at SLCC, his haircut was flat, with visible, no-nonsense bangs — and he was oh-so-accessible. While Philip didn’t give an interview to the Herald (they didn’t ask — they’re too kool for skool now), he made lots of time for Reuters and hung in for the entire 3 days of the fanboyz gathering constantly chatting with residents. At his keynoter, he was all charts and graphs and apologies for poor performance and promising to do better, opening his modest corduroy college jacket to flash a t-shirt with the words MISSING IMAGE and saying “That’s me, in the way.”
Oh, to be sure, once the party got started at the exclusive Volunteer’s gathering, Philip came sporting a transparent pearly-white golf shirt, which exposed what Ingrid Ingersoll immediately dubbed “The Phipple”.
Moving the Slider
Still, we’re a long way from SLCC 1, where the fangirlz got together to buy Philip a replica of his avatar’s trademark rocker T with the gaping red mouth, and even sewed on a sequined crotch to some stone-washed jeans to mimic his scripted, blinging boxers. I got a glimpse of the awkward teenage Philip back then, seeing him blush when I said, with his risque outfit on, he needed to move the “package” slider.
Now, Philip is all delivery. He hung out at the workshops and stood around in the hallways after the talks to answer the most obvious questions, “Why is land so expensive?” in his earnest manner, which has now developed away from laconic California hippie or excited Tesla into something like that quintessential television newscaster’s voice with the STRESS on syllables where YOU don’t expect it (Corey Bridges of Multiverse does a wonderful imitation of that…wait…I don’t think it’s an imitation.) “Because we need to give YOU guys the TOOLS to manage the ECONOMY,” he explains.
I caught up with Philip in the corridor after an SLCC panel and asked him why he was logging on so much more now to the world. Should we worry? Shouldn’t he be retiring to a real-life island like Crete?
I could see the gears turning in the Customer Experience Call Center and finally he said, “Well, Prok, I’m visiting all these cool sites that everyone is telling me about like Straylight.” I had sent him a landmark to Straylight. “And not only you,” he said, ever sure to make sure there’s no FIC — except when there needs to be.
NAPKIN TUTORIAL
Lunch was the usual conference-circuit draped chicken, and as we sawed away, with Arbitrage Wise and Lindsay Druart of SL Capital Markets (yet another stock exchange) plying him with financial questions, Philip dead-panned about Ginko. “I talked to those guys,” he said, seeming to imply that he has known of them for a long time and didn’t believe they had intended a Ponzi scheme. He went on to advise, like Zee, “If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.” Despite repeated pressing to get involved, either by restoring Lindens to those who lost them, or helping to prosecute Ginko, Philip would only reply: “We are staying away from this.”
“But Benjamin Duranske has you wearing stripes by the end of the year, Philip — you’re the cashier for these alleged scams,” I put in. He grinned, all California white teeth and bronze tan. Philip has an uncanny way of conveying repressed mirth and engagement that probably cover up some actual uneasiness or exasperation.
I said I hope he *did* stay out of the banking and stock market business — whether to GOM or regulate or close — precisely so as not to foreclose any interesting and innovative experiments in making more credit and capital to people around the world with the platform of SL. Of course, not even Grameen Bank is the wonder people imagine, what with the flipping of international development agency loans and venal international civil servants, but still…More white teeth.
Philip hit the softball. He nodded enthusiastically. He loves socialist-capitalist thingies like Grameen Bank — and he didn’t *call* Ginko a Grameen Bank, but merely said he was staying out of it so that the Grameen Banks of the world could emerge.
But…back to sim performance! Soon he was laying linen napkins end to end to explain to Arbitrage, who seemed to be drilling him on why you can’t drive or build well between sims, modeling this complicated, intensive “hand-off” of agents between sims. Of course you can just prop up the build with a rooted prim. Philip was as eager and enthusiastic and just plain *helpful* explaining the age-old sim-crack problem as he was 5 years ago.
KEEP HIM AWAY FROM THE CODE
At the Linden party, at least one staffer went racing across the room to get some face time — saying Philip hadn’t been in the office for 4 months — it’s wall-to-wall conferencing, travel, media interviews. They keep Philip away from the code now (Cory, too) as one Linden explained — I guess it stands to reason, as otherwise SL would suffer even more than it does from “Founding Father Syndrome”.
So just what *is* Philip doing all day? Customer satisfaction surveys. Performance metrics. Cleaning up SL of gambling and ageplay, burnishing his image, in order to sell? He keeps saying no, preferring to re-drop the already-made hint that the server code will be open-sourced within a year, and dodging detailed questions about just what the business model will be by that time.
I hobby-horsed him on the Orientation Island issue, and Draxtor, my favourite German machinima TV guy, flipped open his $2000 laptop that was making a movie right as we spoke (and if he had been Scoble, he could have uploaded it right there to Kyte.tv). ‘Do you mind getting on the news?” Draxtor asked, but didn’t really stop filming.
Philip barely missed a beat, and with a flourish, took out a notebook to write down my suggestion about orientation — impressing Draxtor. He wants you to feel *heard*. I think the program for the Reg Apis needs to be opened up to others to assess their metrics, too, and even non-reg API orientation such as the resident-created infohubs need to be measured. “OK, tell you what,” says Philip, all business. “I’ll put everyone who wants in the list, but if their retention rates aren’t at a certain level, they will be cut out.”
SOCIAL DARWINISM
“Social Darwinism!” I cried. “It would be better to just sell the slots on the list,” I said.
“It’s the same thing — people who can compete are the same ones who can afford to pay,” Philip said matter-of-factly, always dismissive of open markets and trading them for technocratic meritocracy. “But newcomers can buy in if they raise the money,” I countered. It’s hopeless.
“Philip looks like a school-boy called to task when you asked him the question after the keynote,” Draxtor commented later. I had asked him what SL’s influence was on First Life now — and in years to come — as that is how ultimately it would be judged. No, it wasn’t a trick question, as Chosen Few thought it was — it was genuine. Would it erode cultural differences? This often happens with mass-market American-made entertainment media overseas. Would it drown out distinction? Or even when hundreds of thousands of Russians and Chinese can in theory log on to Virtual Japan?
As for today’s influence, he replied sanguinely with a mantra that is long-practiced in media interviews and around the office: “We have a thousand people who make more than a $1,000 a month.” Um, is that after tier? As for tomorrow’s…”I think 10 years down the line is when we start to see Second Life taking away time and energy from the real world,” he envisions — with a grand shrinking of the communication sphere. And a seeemingly preposterous notion that virtual worlds will be “bigger than the web.”
Back on earth, the performance charts and graphs told a pretty frank story of a service not always available, with poor FPS for a good chunk of the time and for many people and lost inventory — which he declared as “less” by measuring only one kind of lost inventory problem (no rez from inventory) — a premature declaration indeed as the bug was back this weekend.
WOULD PHILIP BETRAY CHINESE DISSIDENTS?
Many might associate Philip with the ultimate in freedom of expression and creativity, right? That’s because you haven’t figured out that engineering the software is far more important to him than this or that freedom of expression case. Listen to his recent BBC interview. He makes a tremendous mumble about China. The Beeb reporter asks him very directly whether he’d turn over the information about a Chinese dissident to the Chinese government, the way Yahoo did.
Instead of just saying “yes” or “no,” he embarks on a side trip, saying that Yahoo has to play to the lowest common denominator, but SL will be on each country’s servers, and LL will “enable the platform” so that every government can “have the tools they need” for implementing their local laws. Um…is this essentially making China’s work easier for it?
He speaks vaguely about a common set of values that will get evolved as we are all standing “here” — a here that at one point in his interview is “on servers in the U.S. where we have to abide by U.S. law” but at other points seemed more like what Jerry Paffendorf has called “the other here” which is this common sensibility in SL, which presumably overrides pesky things like Chinese censorship (by ways that aren’t clear yet).
Contradicting his point about Yahoo and common denominators, Philip explains ardently that if, for the good of the platform, to make it available to the most people, they had to make some restrictions due to laws (like those against gambling in the U.S.), then, that sacrifice would indeed be made. Would their be some Chinese dissident eggs broken in making this omelette? The reporter pressed: will you in fact turn over the dissident names?
Philip begins to mumble again — but professionally and smoothly mumble, like “We as a company pride ourselves on maintaining privacy” blah blah blah. He concedes that they would have to look at each case.
We’re left thinking that if LL ever has an office in Asia, and the Chinese government asks them to shut down a parcel or give a name, “for the good of the platform,” they just might do it — all their high-minded talk about not playing to the lowest common denominator like Yahoo, notwithstanding.
This is what it takes — Philip enduring endless fanboyz questioning, falling on his sword and displaying poor performance charts and vowing to do better, making some patter up that sort of kinda sounds like it isn’t like Yahoo about China. This is what it takes so that “everybody in the world will use Second Life — something he appears genuinely to believe in.
Tenshi Vielle
Sep 3rd, 2007
AH HAAH! Knew you’d be back.
economic mip
Sep 3rd, 2007
Tenshi beat me to it (not that I am complaining welcome back Prokofy. The strange thing is, whenever I hear Phil talk I think, “great ideas, now if you could just keep the world from falling apart.” And on the orientation island “issue” if you can’t beat them, join them, create a better one, then fill out the paperwork to get the 10% of the people. Now if you will excuse me, I am going to go back to exploring the entire world. (Oh and someone tell the BBC how to turn off the ambient noise on their podcasts). “Is there a wider purpose to Second Life, no.” Well that says everything Philip, says everything.
Alaska Metro
Sep 3rd, 2007
PHIPPLE!!!!
Becka Jane
Sep 3rd, 2007
I thought you quit? Long, eye bleeding posts about how you’d never be back on your blog and everything, complete with chat logs from your fellows here at the herald that only served to make you look more like a joke. Guess your little “competitor newspaper” blog got only 2-3 hits and you had to come crawling back here huh? No fun to pen war and peace sized posts and not have an audience huh? Even one that mostly just laughs at you.
Poor, poor Prok.
anothr user
Sep 4th, 2007
Anothr feed track -Second Life Herald
One new subscriber from Anothr Alerts
Reg Baxter
Sep 4th, 2007
Wow, well I noticed the articles length before I noticed the authors name but as soon as I saw it, it all made sense.
I will say welcome back to try and offset all the nasty comments that are going to be coming just because it’s you who wrote it.
Azzu Manga
Sep 4th, 2007
*facepalm*
Who let it back in?
Prokofy Neva
Sep 4th, 2007
No, I’m not back, really; as I had said, when there are grave matters of national importance, I’ll post just to get a wider audience, but I have 2 blogs of my own to maintain now.
I really don’t like the nastiness in the comments and the failure of anybody to stand up to them.
I’m told that Azzu Manga is Hazim Gazov, and that he really does go to the RL Woodbury. Of course, this could all be propaganda. I got to meet the odious little bastard at SLCC. He stalked me and tried to take my picture and shoved a phone in my face telling me to talk to Tizzers *rolls eyes*. Oh, now I get the problem. He is a runty little ugly guy in RL, shorter even than me. So griefing in an online virtual world is how he gets to be tall. Glad we cleared *that* up.
I’ve had a surprising number of hits on my new blog but it’s hard to maintain. I don’t feel very much at home at the Herald for all the reasons I’ve stated. I thought I’d post something when I saw Uri was really scraping the barrel, rewriting his old book chapters and posting them — I realized things were desperate.
BTW, I was googling Urizenus and reading how he retired from the Herald last year. Good thing he came back, really. A dog returns to its vomit, like the old Latin expression says!
Prokofy Neva
Sep 4th, 2007
BTW, I see somehow the proper photo credits didn’t go in.
The first photo was taken by Ugo Trade, who had a brilliant interview with Philip up where he actually finally says the thing I predicted — a sensible business plan — where he is going to allow some trusted types first to be the ones to have their own servers and connect to the grid as “trusted servers” (in the technical and social sense, too, I imagine) then open it up larger. He imagines LL will always be like New York, big — and staying big and attractive “just because”.
The nipple pictures comes from SC, not sure who took it, not Ingrid, probably moo or
someong
http://www.ugotrade.com/2007/08/29/ugotrade-interview-with-philip-rosedale-at-slcc-bigger-
than-the-web-and-second-life-in-africa/
I have to admire Ugo Trade. She sprucely nabbed Philip in the hallway and record and photographed him on the spot with her iphone and got brilliant stuff about Africa and his business plan in 10 minutes. Meanwhile, I shlubbed around with the fanboyz, sat through lunches and parties, and got bupkus — well, the nip and the napkin talk, of course. Live and learn.
The Phipple picture is on Ingrid Ingersoll’s post at SC here, but I don’t see any credit for it. Anyone know who took it?:
http://forums.secondcitizen.com/showthread.php?p=406504
I can’t believe somebody already made a t-shirt just like Philip’s Phipple shirt for SL avatars.
Artemis Fate
Sep 4th, 2007
“I really don’t like the nastiness in the comments and the failure of anybody to stand up to them.” -Prokofy Neva
“Oh, now I get the problem. He is a runty little ugly guy in RL, shorter even than me. So griefing in an online virtual world is how he gets to be tall.” -Prokofy Neva in the very next paragraph.
Yeah, why doesn’t anyone stand up to the nastiness in those comments?
“Good riddance!!! …I mean to Prok. :p She’s a fucking asshole, horrible writer, conspiracy theorist, who thinks everyone is out to get her. Maybe getting away from this place will help her re-adjust to normal society. –Psych.”
“Prok (or Pork) has become what she has professed to hate… A whiney, snivelly griefer. Nothing better to do than hate and whine. Time to make a new alt, and toss this hatefilled bag of puss aside, prokofy. Cheers to Second Life Safari, for ribbing her good.–duh hick”.
“Shoot, if Prok is gone I’m back in.–Heartun Breaker”
“I’ve been PRAYING for the day Prokofy leaves, though. If I wanted that much ignorant hate, I’d watch Bill O’Reilly. At least wehen BOR calls someone a socialist, he knows what it means.–Kahni Poitier.”
“I’m glad to see the winds changing at the Herald. The format here has a lot of potential if only the reporting was more focused. Also seeing positive articles that aren’t about avatar models and other silly shit would be nice! I’m positive that SOMETHING good happens in SL once in a while…not around Prok, though!–DaveOner”
“Is *everyone* that disagrees with you a liar and a fraud, Prok?–Alyx Stoklitsky”
“Wow. You’re a real classy lady Prok. I know not to trust you now.–Dire Allen”
“With both of you girls, I would start from the very basics. Could you girls first point me the body part you think is the penis? Lesbian Lisae is no expert and Prokofy has probably forgotten, even if she might have some wishful subconscious thoughts of refreshing her memory, which make her see what she wants. “The landmark Lisae provided to me teleported me directly into a camper’s pole,” I’m very sorry that I missed your pole dance. I suspect that Prokofy had erotic fantasies about screwing Michael Linden too when (s)he wrote the article. I predict that we will soon suffer from an article about flying fat naked little kids called cherubs–Coincidental Avatar”.
“Wow, Prok. You’ve outdone yourself with the shifting of blame…Looks like you’d better brush up on the Journalism correspondence course! Simply signing up doesn’t mean you know shit!..except for how you were the author of 6 of the 17 articles on the front page…that’s roughly more than 1/3 and I don’t think there are just 3 writers for the SLH. This doesn’t include the multiple article-length comments full of insults and bile you spew on each of them. Now you’re constantly dropping links to your little blog since SLH isn’t playing by your rules anymore. I agree, Prok. This formula isn’t working too well for SLH. Maybe you should jump ship while you can!
–DaveOner”
“This won’t do Prok. Even our advertisements have open comments. Hence, I’ve opened the comments for this story. Deal with it. Be a virtual man.–Urizenus Sklar”
“Wow, I almost just earned abit of respect for you Uri. Way To Go.–Verbena Pennyfeather”
“Huzzah for comments! If I wanted to read Prok’s private blog, I wouldn’t be here in the first place. Moderation to keep out bad language is a good idea – deletion of anything she considers DoubleplusUngood is not. And if you don’t want to listen to the troublemakers in the comments, don’t read any. Not everyone is worth replying to. Standing up for ones self and telling the asshats of the world to “bring it, beeyotchs” is not the same thing. Some folks just aren’t worth the calories it takes to listen to, much less respond to. And the wise warrior knows how to choose his fights.–shockwave yareach”
“why thank you Alyx. It’s common knowledge that prokofy has a unique relationship with many griefer groups. We need to be brave enough to ask the tough questions, look at the evidence and begin to answer them. Is prokofy a memeber of the PN? Is her “war” on them merely just part of their propaganda machine? has she/he played the biggest part in their notoriety? maybe we’ll never know…–dick burns”
“In short Prokofy dearie, you’re taking the easy road out simply because you are unable and unwilling to focus on the message instead of the messenger. Oh and Dearie? Nice try in attempting to put yourself across as ‘running an experiment’. What you were really doing was sending people to your Blog so you could control the conversation and remove opposing opinions.–Reality”
Oh! I guess people do.
I guess Prokofy’s 3 year old Temper tantrum is over, and the long annoying batshit insane stories will begin trickling in again. At least the Herald had a bit of a break from Prokofy’s nutbag conspiracy theories.
Prokofy Neva
Sep 4th, 2007
Good round-up there, Artemis — like I said, it’s the voice of Pixeleen. Your voice, too.
Now, why would I make a comment about Hazim Gazov?
1. He stalked me rudely and nastily at the SLCC, forcing himself on me, trying to get me to talk into a phone, and trying to take my picture. He was the only person who did that. Even the SC gang stayed in their playpens.
2. Little Hazim and his little friends have been griefing me night after night with particles and self-replicating objects — costing me literally hundreds of dollars of business as people move out. Sorry, but if nobody else will fight back, I will.
Prokofy Neva
Sep 4th, 2007
Here’s Draxtor’s film from SLCC:
http://technorati.com/videos/youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D3vlBFxxN9gQ
Jim Schack
Sep 4th, 2007
oh lawd! Helping Azzu troll you IRL was FAR too epic.
Perhaps next year we’ll do a better job.
no-one
Sep 4th, 2007
“No, I’m not back, really; as I had said, when there are grave matters of national importance, I’ll post just to get a wider audience”
“A dog returns to its vomit, like the old Latin expression says!”
Indeedy. Welcome back in any case, missed the long posts… always fun to read.
Azzu Manga
Sep 4th, 2007
“Oh, now I get the problem. He is a runty little ugly guy in RL, shorter even than me. So griefing in an online virtual world is how he gets to be tall.”
My avatar is 4’8”… biatch. >:3
Nidol
Sep 4th, 2007
“Little Hazim and his little friends have been griefing me night after night with particles and self-replicating objects — costing me literally hundreds of dollars of business as people move out. Sorry, but if nobody else will fight back, I will.” – Prokofy Neva
Maybe that’s a sign for you not to rely on a crappy online game for your main source of income…
Observer
Sep 4th, 2007
“I really don’t like the nastiness in the comments and the failure of anybody to stand up to them.”
Whaaa. After all the bridges you burned here, who can blame them for calling you (rightfully so) a hypocrite? You are just one of the biggest attention whores out there, Prok.
Prokofy Neva
Sep 4th, 2007
So, Obsever, I fully expect you to call Uri a hypocrite for announcing with a big flourish that he was “retiring” from the Herald…then coming back? Where were you then?
And perhaps you might call Pixeleen a hypocrite for promising and drafting an editorial in defense of reporters and (ostensibly) standing up to some of this crap in the comments — and then withdrawing it? Whatever. You’re the hypocrite, like everyone else here that allows all this to fester.
Verbena Pennyfeather
Sep 4th, 2007
I think, in a case like this, only Skwisgaar Skwigelf can say it right:
Okay, let me explains again, in prefectly clear English, I wants, Prokofys, to goes, away, okay? How many times I gots to tell this peoples?!
Observer
Sep 4th, 2007
two peas in a pod….
Victorria Paine
Sep 4th, 2007
“So, Obsever, I fully expect you to call Uri a hypocrite for announcing with a big flourish that he was “retiring” from the Herald…then coming back? Where were you then?”
Oh come on! Uri *founded* the Herald — he’s in a special situation, very different from yours.
Oh, and then there’s the fact that you seem to manage to piss off virtually everyone — so, yes, people will jump all over you, Prok. You’ve invited that by being a jackass to everyone over the years.
Lukah Oh
Sep 4th, 2007
This was a fun read. Why is everyone bitching?
Tamara Kirshner
Sep 4th, 2007
This reminds me of something, and not in a good way.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MPha27dZK0U
Prokofy Neva
Sep 4th, 2007
Hey, goddamn it, I REALLY. DO. NOT. LIKE. being raked over the coals by Ugo Trade and by Hiro Pen accusing me on Twitter of ignoring people’s IP, not putting in a photo credit, and only as an “afterthought” putting it in the comments.
Fucking shit! I SENT THIS ARTICLE ORIGINALLY WITH PHOTO CREDITS. THEY WERE IGNORED, AND NOT PUT IN BY THE EDITRIX.
HELLO? I then emailed Pixeleen twice, pointing out that the article had posted without the photocredits.
That’s why I put in a comment. And “BTW, I see somehow the proper photo credits didn’t go in” doesn’t mean *I* forgot to put them in by the picture: it means the EDITORS didn’t put them in EVEN THOUGH I SENT THEM. Why? I have no idea.
With this retarded “Junior Author” bullshit that the Herald has set up now, you cannot put your picture with the article. That function is turned off. So I sent the photos AND THEIR CREDITS DUH, I’M NOT RETARDED to Pixeleen with a very clear statement: here are the photos and their credits, put them up. Next thing I know — photos, no credits. I reminder her again. AND I send an IM inworld. Ignored. She goes to bed early. She goes to RL work early. She doesn’t have time for this — even though it’s now all even further bottlenecked up on her.
So, Ugo Trade, I’m sorry, I did my best. And Hiro Pendragon, fuck you. You should be thoroughly ashamed, I’ve never in my life done anything to somehow harm somebody’s IP. That’s fucking ridiculous. Write to pixeleen.mistral@gmail.com and bitch there.
And Tish, while it’s annoying, truly, be grateful that you have more hits to your blog, that you will indeed get credit as soon as Pixeleen wakes up to this, and that no, it is not my fault, and one more evidence of why having posting functions bottlenecked to one person is really assanine — nobody can fix things like this.
SqueezeOne Pow
Sep 4th, 2007
How much attention do you need, Prok?
Tenshi Vielle
Sep 4th, 2007
Prok, I don’t think you’re quite the person to be ragging on Uri for returning… after all, you’re the one that threw the tantrum and said you wouldn’t be back – and now you are. Big surprise.
Glad to know your blogs are still unsuccessful in hits though… and that the Herald still beats yours!!
Chav Paderborn
Sep 4th, 2007
I quite enjoyed the article.
No, really.
Prokofy Neva
Sep 4th, 2007
Um, my blogs get plenty of hits, given that one is new with a small group of people, and the other, while older, is just me.
What have you done, lately, Tenshi, you couldn’t even write one story out of SLCC?!
I didn’t throw any tantrum. I continue to take a stand on principle. I posted a story here basically because Uri came and talked to me inworld and encouraged me to do so.
I didn’t rag on Uri for returning. I rejoiced that he returned. The Herald sorely needed him. But my point is that no one of you sordid little bitches ragged on Uri for doing this — because you think I’m just a convenient punching bag. Fuck you, Tenshi, go write a story instead of being pathetic.
Corona
Sep 4th, 2007
For Phil Linden to be a re-invention suggests he was invented rather than born
what I would like to know is who holds the patent : )
DaveOner
Sep 4th, 2007
Uh, yeah Prok, that was a tantrum you threw you sexy accomplished writer, you!
“Glad to know your blogs are still unsuccessful in hits though… and that the Herald still beats yours!!”
Well she bans people from her blog with differring opinions so her numbers are bound to slip!
I knew your announcement of leaving the Herald was too good to be true. Everyone prepare for more of the “10 Prok ‘articles’ for every Post 6 fluff piece” effect. Our “good article” vacation seems to have come to an end!
DaveOner
Sep 4th, 2007
“…grave matters of national importance…” <–just noticed that.
So your world is so small that issues in a half-working computer game are “grave matters of national importance”?? You really need to get out more. Try reading the real news, too. There’s plenty of shit going on in the REAL WORLD that would actually warrant this type of overzealous ranting.
But then again you’re in here to get away from out there, afterall, aren’t you?
Tenshi Vielle
Sep 4th, 2007
No, Prok. I don’t think you’re a convenient punching bag, but in the midst of all of your holier-than-thou commentary you flip right the fuck out and say things like what you just did up – well, scroll up. I’m sure you remember.
I didn’t go to SLCC. I told you that in reply to a blog of yours that said something akin to the Herald being too cool to attend; on the contrary, the toilet and I were busy having close-quarters discussions each day.
Anonymous
Sep 4th, 2007
I wouldn’t be talking about blog hits if I were you Tenshi – the same four friends of yours are the only ones to ever comment on SCD, besides the contributors. I can’t count how many entries have only your name or Evariel’s in the comments.
Personally I think that’s a LOT more pathetic than having a small reader base.
DaveOner
Sep 4th, 2007
“I didn’t go to SLCC. I told you that in reply to a blog of yours that said something akin to the Herald being too cool to attend; on the contrary, the toilet and I were busy having close-quarters discussions each day.”
I heard you had to leave room for the Holy Ghost during the dancing portion of the SLCC and that no alcohol or holding hands was allowed.
You guys know Prok was just feeling lonely and wanted the pick-me-up that only tons of negative attention can bring her, right? If we were all to just stop adding comments to her “articles” she’ll either go away or freak out more (which would be that much more entertaining anyway). That being said, this is my last comment on a Prok-tardicle ever.
I swear I could quit at any time!
Oh and last thing Prock, no one rags on Uri because he’s capable of actually writing good articles. Even when they’re on Bukkake they’re still much more coherent than the goofiness you scribble!
Nina A
Sep 4th, 2007
Tenshi Vielle
Sep 4th, 2007
Oh, I wasn’t saying my blog is better than Prok’s. By far, I’m sure she gets more hits there than we do at SCD.
I was comparing her blog to the Herald.
Thanks for your input though! Love you!
Tenshi Vielle
Sep 4th, 2007
Dave: We need rehab. Let’s go. I’ll be Amy; you can be the hubby that beats me on a verge of a coke binge! (and I so mean Coca-Cola, which URI JUDGED… *plug*)
Nacon
Sep 4th, 2007
SON OF A BITCH! Why?!
WHY?!
WHY THE FUCK DID YOU LET THE HO-TARD BACK IN!?
(I guess Pixeleen can’t handle being the insane one.)
Artemis Fate
Sep 4th, 2007
“:( Prokofy makes the SLHerald interesting, are we forgetting the wonderful bukake article or the ‘almost got laid’ article that past as news when Prok wasn’t here?”
Well, it’s not like Prokofy being around is going to stop the other articles, all it’s going to mean is that in addition to the bukkake and “almost got laid” articles, you get like 6 articles of Prokofy’s batshit nuts ravings.
Artemis Fate
Sep 4th, 2007
“So, Obsever, I fully expect you to call Uri a hypocrite for announcing with a big flourish that he was “retiring” from the Herald…then coming back? Where were you then?”
Urizenus didn’t write a bunch whiny posts on his blog about the severe “injustices” of the Herald, claim he’s never coming back ever, create a giant conspiracy theory around Pixeleen and post about it in story comments, and then eventually come back anyways. Urizenus just posted a paragraph long article saying he was retiring and it was mostly full of jokes, I’d say most people didn’t even realize he’d decided to retire, because he didn’t make a huge deal out of it. No, Urizenus retiring and coming back isn’t hypocritical, but you leaving, saying you’re never coming back and how cruel and horrible the Herald is, then coming back anyways is. Your hypocrisies aren’t a secret anyways, you’ve done the exact same thing with SLCC and Second Citizen, here’s another example:
“I’ve never in my life done anything to somehow harm somebody’s IP.” -Prokofy Neva
“I AM PROUD TO SELL FREEBIES AND I DEFEND THE RIGHTS OF FREEBIE SELLERS.” -Prokofy Neva
“Yay, freebie sellers! I love freebie sellers. People who don’t want stuff to be sold need to unclick transfer.” -Prokofy Neva
Artemis Fate
Sep 4th, 2007
“Good round-up there, Artemis — like I said, it’s the voice of Pixeleen. Your voice, too.”
How is a bunch of completely separate people calling you, rightfully, a dick the “voice of pixeleen”? Are you SO far gone that you can’t even tell that it’s not her “encouraging” this, as you said, but it’s YOU. You’re the one who puts up these hateful and almost always entirely inaccurate slanderous stories based on your conspiracy theories, and you’re somehow SURPRISED when people get pissed off and fight back? If anything is the “Voice of Pixeleen” it’s that your stories were even allowed on in the first place, considering they were usually full of more insults, slander, and hate than the ones above combined. What, so you want her to post up your stories unedited with all the hate, slander, and slurs you can muster, but it’s NOT okay for people to defend themselves against it, or reply back with that little thing we call Freedom of Speech? You know, for a guy who likes to use Russian Communism to describe everything he doesn’t like, you certainly do embody it.
You say you believe in equality for everyone, no favoritism, but your actions say you really just want to be favorited yourself. (Some animals are more equal than others, hm?) You say you’re all about freedom of press and opinion when you put up your hate-stories, but when someone fights back, suddenly it’s a conspiracy against you because the editor didn’t ritualistically trample out any opposing opinions. You can’t even see people as individuals, if a person is a member of a group you don’t like, you attribute all the things you don’t like about the group to them. If that’s not the mindset of a communist dictator, I don’t know what is.
Artemis Fate
Sep 4th, 2007
You wonder why you get griefed so much? You wonder why people harrass you at SLCC? It’s because you’re nuts. You get yourself griefed by being a loud hateful slanderous bitch, who whines and cries everytime something doesn’t go your way. That’s why you get griefed. Ever seen the Encyclopedia Dramatica article on you (a wiki that is used and edited by some griefers like PN especially pretaining to Second Life), they got it dead on:
“She claims to detest being griefed by W-Hatters, yet it evades her that every time she opens her mouth she makes herself a target thanks to her non stop stream of inane statments. Prokofy dosn’t just feed the trolls, she serves them up a three course meal. She also happens to be batshit insane.”
Or are the griefers the “Voice of Pixeleen” too? Maybe, just MAYBE, if you actually looked through your articles, took out the personal attacks, took out the slander, researched your facts, tried to keep a non-biased standpoint, and otherwise actually acted like a real reporter, you’d find you wouldn’t have people feeling the need to defend themselves against you?
But no, you won’t will you? You’re fighting against what you perceive to be the “injustice” of the virtual world, and that makes any injustice you inflict on others okay, doesn’t it?
Welcome to Stalingrad, Comrade.
Kahni Poitier
Sep 4th, 2007
Cute more of Proks whining, bitching and complaining in 5…4…3…
C’mon Herald. Get rid of this loon for good.
Kahni Poitier
Sep 4th, 2007
dang typos.
Anyway. There’s a reason people hate you, Prok. Your attitude.
Why do you insist on forcing yourself back into a place you’re hated?
Miss all the attention and drama?
Go feed your cats.
Cocoanut Koala
Sep 4th, 2007
Good God.
coco
Angel
Sep 4th, 2007
Damn I was enjoying how the Herald had improved and focussed on Bukkake, Gor and Black Men’s Skins without Prok’s Epistles taking the fun away.
Oh well.
Second Lulz Vigilante
Sep 4th, 2007
“saying that gosh, he engineered this platform, and wow, all these people came on it and he didn’t know what to do with them…”
Open registration was obviously a bad idea. Yep, Phipple is king noob.
“The Beeb reporter asks him very directly whether he’d turn over the information about a Chinese dissident to the Chinese government, the way Yahoo did.”
He’s probably do it in a heartbeat.
However…
“It’s the same thing — people who can compete are the same ones who can afford to pay,” Philip said matter-of-factly, always dismissive of open markets and trading them for technocratic meritocracy.”
Techmocratic what? It sounds like you view SL as a country. It isn’t. It’s a service.
Observer
Sep 4th, 2007
Oh Prok. Spin all you want, I’m not talking about Uri or Pixel. I’m talking about YOU. Quit trying to divert the attention to them. Don’t try to push off the blame to others. I’m only targeting you on this one. Uri’s a moron. Read up some of my comments and you’ll clearly see that.
Quit running from your problems only to come running back expecting open arms.
Perhaps you should look up the word ‘hypocrite’. Calling me one when I am calling you out on your own hypocracy is quite laughable…but go on, I am sure we’ll have some witty rebuttal that will spin the issue yet again.
Editorandpublisher Ampersand
Sep 4th, 2007
Someone sure needs to come in and edit out all the “Prok Sux” comments here so those of us who would like to hear people’s comments ABOUT THE ARTICLE can find them without wallowing through a bunch of wannabee kindergarten playground-bully chuds chasing an old lady around the parking lot (but you’re only an old lady as characterized these forums Prok, in RL, I may be older than you and you have my every respect, so I apologize for using the old lady analogy).
I thought the article was well written and contained a lot of fun information. It also showed that Prok asks excellent questions in her interviews with people, and often the questions are not what the interviewee expected to be put on the spot to answer. You do a great job Prok, and I hope you continue despite the constant “chicken peckers” plucking for blood.
Linden Labs seems to me to be trying the best they can to involve the “community” in pertinent decisions – but they always run into the “Office Meeting as a Forum” syndrome (as Tamara pointed out above).
If I were a Linden in the middle of one of these clusterfux, I’d tell you all to STFU and sit down while I shut the whole thing down until we reach an amicable meeting where things can be rationally discussed. (Does no Linden employee have a copy of “Robert’s Rules of Order”?)
Any common armchair idiot or forum noob can complain and fabricate visions of horrible things happening to their precious precious, but what we need is CONSTRUCTIVE IDEAS on how to improve things. Not kindergarten playground cliques forming lynch-mobs or running all Chicken Little about the freakin’ sky falling. Flip the goddamn coin people, and look at the other side – for example;
If (something) is not working to your expectations, how would you change (something) so that it represents the most benefit for all involved?
Instead of “I hate (him/her/it) and if (he/she/it) continues it will ruin my little dream world and I will leave, boo-hoo! (kicks a puppy)”
Try to first examine what is bothering you, then determine what steps might be taken to alleviate the problem. Expect your solutions to be considered and accept the fact that your solution might not hold a maximum benefit for others. Take rejections with maturity and some semblance of professionalism, so the meeting can move on productively.
I enjoyed the article, Prok – one of the best ones to come out of SLCC so far, IMHO. I laughed at the Phipple, and literally LOL’d at your comment to Philip about adjusting his “package slider” haha. You sure threw him with a few hard hitting questions, and peppered the article with amusing observations that only you could make. Generally, I thought it was a thoroughly enjoyable article, from beginning to end. Its very seldom that I go back and re-read an article just for the sheer enjoyment, but this was one of them. Thanks Prok.
Reg Baxter
Sep 4th, 2007
Well the verbal diarrhea just started flowing in faster than I even imagined. 90% of the negative nasty posts about Prok are just because its Prok has nothing to do with the article at all.
This was of course to be expected and Artemis Fate taking the time to go back and find 20+ quotes that have zero to with the post is a perfect example of the idiocy of the mob.
On thing is true though Prok, you do flip right the fuck out and say things that sure do help help your case.
All in all the posts on this article will be 60 or 80 or higher in the next while which I’m sure has Uri giggling all the way to the bank, its just a shame almost none will be about the actual article