Archive for 'News from The Sims Online'

First Sims Bank is a Scam!

In a shocking pre-election development, we can now confirm that the First Sims Bank, run by Dre Jeffries, and endorsed and prominently featured on the Alphaville Government Web site, is a scam bank! In this case we have first hand knowledge. Urizenus himself had 500K on deposit with the bank and has been trying to [...]

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Lucianna/Eliana speaks: “Celestie and I are on the Throne now”

In this interview, long time Evangeline associate Lucianna (formerly Elianna) talks about her early association with Evangeline in the days of Hotel Erotica (and about how customers and employees were duped into public cybering with false promises of 500K). She also talks about movements of the Free Money franchise to FF and BF (typically with [...]

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Mayhem breaks out at Oprah Show

Tonight?s Oprah Winfrey show uncharacteristically broke out into a Jerry-Springeresque melee, when Oprah interviewed Alphaville Scammer Viva T (formerly Isabella, Angelica, Fruitcake Lady, etc). When Viva was introduced there was a great deal of heckling, as one might expect, but then a surprise guest ? Ms. Barbara Walters ? took the stage and upbraided Viva [...]

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Election Shocker! Mr-President enlisted mafia to “oversee” election

by The Teflon Don I recently received a tip from a group calling themselves the Sim Liberation Army (SLA for short they said, like that mattered). They said that they had received some information that the Soprano family had rigged the primary elections and were set to rig the final elections about to come up. [...]

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Bad Girls are Back in Town

by m tovar exclusive to av herald… grandma celestie and av’s badgirl arrived at the av herald’s headquarters this afternoon eager to let alphaville citizens know that they’re back and ready to scam. grandma and badgirl identify themselves as original members of evangeline’s family, and are looking forward to parting all sims, both newbies and [...]

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Ashley quits debate early. Illness or HBO???

Yesterday’s Presidential Debate ended early, when candidate Ashley Richardson took her leave at 9:00 PM eastern, claiming illness. Mr-President immediately charged that she was not ill at all, but on her way to see the Soprano’s on HBO. Whatever the reason for her early departure, you can count on the Alphaville Herald to bring you [...]

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AVG gets New CIA Chief

The Alphaville Government has replaced its CIA Chief Fans, who left the game recently following altercations with noted scammer and opponent of the Alphaville Government, Mr. President Bradley. In his press release, the new Director, named Alex Sanchez, promises to be a much tougher customer. He has already thrown down the gauntlet to the “Enemies [...]

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Mob Hits get Serious: Former Soprano Member gets the “Moe Green Special”

by The Teflon Don Many have heard of the term Moe Green Special before. On the Sopranos TV show perhaps? Maybe on The Godfather where the Moe Green Special originated? For some of you, you have heard it somewhere else. Whispers of a tactic in the game that can take everything you own and love [...]

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Maxis Plans Customer Humiliation Joke for April Fools

I decided to move this up from an earlier thread, because it deserves a topic of its own. Tomorrow, as an “April Fools joke”, all avatars in TSO will have monkey faces, and when you try to type out messages your sim will blurt out (in chat) some stuff about bananas and parts of a [...]

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EA’s Jeff Brown Speaks Out!: Sex in TSO is impossible!

Jeff Brown, infamous smack talker, cheetah deleter, midlife crisis poster boy, and EA’s Director of Corporate Communications has circulated a press release to a number of media outlets (including CNN and Tech TV). In it he argues that cybersex in TSO is impossible and that simoleans have no real world financial value (hence cyber-prostitution is [...]

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